Of Strawberry Fields and Fools on the Hills
by MsTonksLupin
Summary: Undoubtedly everything's bad about a war. Apart from one thing. It can make you realize what a cowardly git you've been, and find out what matters the most in your life: giving love and accepting it. Accepting it is the most difficult part.- A sequel to 'Pink Army Boots and Elbow Patched Tweed', Remus and Tonks' story during the Deathly Hallows, with a little help from the Beatles.
1. Strawberry Fields Forever

**This is a sequel to my story 'Of Pink Army Boots and Elbow Patched Tweed'. It is Remus and Tonks' story during the Deathly Hallows, and as unbelievable as it might sound, I promise a happy ending! It is going to be a quite long story, with much much help from the Beatles, in the same way as my previous fic.**

**For those of you who supported my previous story, thank you SO much, for those of you who are ready to start reading this one, I equally thank you : )**

**Please review, it will mean a lot!**

**Song: Strawberry Fields, The Beatles**

Remus Lupin could not remember a hotter summer since their seventh year, something which had made it particularly difficult to concentrate and study for the NEWTs. It was quite unusual for a London resident to experience such a weather. He caught himself wishing it was winter multiple times every day. In winter he could wear his old patched cardigans and brogues under his wizard robes, but now he found it a little odd and uncomfortable to walk around in Nymphadora Tonks' flat in his graying t-shirt and striped boxer shorts. Not that he was trying to seduce her, no, it just was impossible for him to wear anything heavier, at least when he wasn't out.

It was true, even if it was extremely difficult to believe it. Remus Lupin was staying at Nymphadora Tonks' crazy flat, with the multicolor sofa and the dancing chairs in the kitchen, with the water mattress bed and the singing-out-of-tune bathroom mirror. It still required some effort from him to realize how lucky he had been, and he simply could not verbalize how thankful he felt for his fate. You see, a dangerous, poor werewolf like Remus Lupin, would never think that a cheerful, clumsy, beautiful auror ten years his junior would fall madly in love with him. Well, cheerful, she had been not the previous year, but she was now.

And he would never even think of falling in love with her.

But apparently, it had happened, and he was unable to do anything to stop it.

**Let me take you down, 'cause I'm going to Strawberry Fields.****  
****Nothing is real and nothing to get hung about.****  
****Strawberry Fields forever.**

The door opened and he ran from the kitchen, wiping his hands in a towel, to greet her. Her hair was mint green and she was a little tanned. She was wearing a pair of bright purple studded shorts under her wizard robes, and her vibrant polka dot sneakers, with a clashing pair of yellow socks. She was covered in sweat and there were dark circles under her eyes.

"What is your patronus?" he asked.

"A werewolf. What is your favorite chocolate flavor?"

"Honeydukes mint and molasses."

"Yeah, right, like anyone else would like that thing apart from you." She grinned, pulling his face for a light kiss. "How was your day?"

"Peaceful. Did some research for the goblins that Kingsley ordered, read some Muggle literature, sweated to death and had a shower three times, and bewitched your oven to bake cakes in twenty minutes. You know, feeling extremely useful as usual." He said bitterly, stroking her hair.

"You _are _extremely useful."

"What about your day?" he asked as they headed to the couch.

"Well, just as peaceful as yours, I guess. Had a row with Dawlish, and then went to a house previously attacked by Death Eaters. Found the parents and a son dead, and escorted two girls to the orphanage." Her voice broke and tears appeared in her eyes. Remus Lupin sighed and pulled her in his arms.

******Living is easy with eyes closed, misunderstanding all you see.****  
****It's getting hard to be someone but it all works out.****  
****It doesn't matter much to me.**

He didn't have something to say, it was quite a difficult time for all of them, especially now that Dumbledore was gone, but it was twice as difficult for Nymphadora, obviously because of her job. There wasn't a way to comfort her, he already knew that. He would never stop admiring her for being so strong with all that she experienced every day.

"You are a brave witch, Dora."

"A brave witch who fails at saving innocent people from getting killed." She sobbed, with a muffed voice, as she hid her face in his chest.

"It is not humanly possible to save them every time, love. However, you still make it most of the times. You should be proud." He gave her his handkerchief and she blew her nose. "The limiting regulation for half-breeds arrived today with an owl, by the way."

"What does it say?"

"Charming things. Filthy werewolves, don't you dare date wizards, don't get out of your house, don't breathe, don't use the toilet, the Ministry has any right to put you in Azkaban…"

"Umbridge is an old bat Remus, we already know that." She said. "I should go make you something to eat."

He chuckled. "I have already eaten, and there's some fried fish ready for you in the kitchen. You are tired enough not to cook. Besides, we both know you'd burn it." She smiled half-heartedly. "I'm not hungry at all, Remus."

"Go and have a nice shower then, the heat is insufferable. Then have a nap. But you'll definitely taste my specialité, even if you're not in the mood for fish!"

"What's that, may I ask?"

"Wait and see."

**Let me take you down, 'cause I'm going to Strawberry Fields.****  
****Nothing is real and nothing to get hung about.****  
****Strawberry Fields forever.**

She sighed while undressing, and entered the shower. She let the cold water fall on her aching muscles, it was quite a relief from her hard day. She got out and wrapped a towel around her, morphed her hair reddish pink, then walked to the bedroom, and fell heavily on the bed. She decided to wait for him, but her eyelids betrayed her and closed, her body relaxed, and she drifted to a light sleep.

******No one I think is in my tree, I mean it must be high or low.****  
****That is you can't you know tune in but it's all right.****  
****That is I think it's not too bad.**

Nymphadora Tonks was feeling so hot and sweaty again, but something was different now. Something cool, wet and unidentified was gently touching her back, waking her up and sending pleasant shivers to her whole body. "What is that?" she smiled, without opening her eyes. Next thing she felt, was the same thing that was touching her on her lips. The scent of her favorite fruit made her sigh in bliss, and she opened her mouth in order to taste it. "Strawberry…" she mumbled. She opened her eyes and saw him sitting next to her on the bed. He lowered his head as she turned on her back, and his lips captured hers in a kiss which tasted of strawberries too. He caressed her hair and she sighed, as her hands slid under his t-shirt. She broke the kiss and started trailing kisses on his neck, and then… he got away from her.

"What are you doing?" she asked with a surprised look on her face.

"You have to try my specialité." He made his way to the kitchen.

"Remus bloody Lupin," she groaned, "I was ready for a shag there, and you stopped kissing me to bring me pancakes? What a spoilsport!"

He entered the room holding a round bowl and a spoon. He sat next to her and placed it on the table. "Does it seem like pancakes to you?" he asked teasingly. She grinned when she saw the pink content of the bowl. "I didn't know you knew how to make ice-cream!" She said admiringly.

"Well, it seems like I do! Come on, won't you try?"

She had already put a big spoonful of homemade strawberry ice-cream in her mouth, and she had some on her chin too. "It's perfect, Remus! Why the hell are you so talented in everything?"

"Everybody has their own talents, Dora, if you know what I mean! Just be careful, don't eat too fast."

Her nose turned to a pig snout, in order to emphasize on his words about her manner of eating, which was identical to the one of her beloved, lost cousin, Sirius Black.

******Let me take you down, 'cause I'm going to Strawberry Fields.****  
****Nothing is real and nothing to get hung about.****  
****Strawberry Fields forever.**

But suddenly, she discovered the reason he had warned her. Her teeth bit something solid, was it an almond? No, the taste was that of metal.

"What kind of sorcery is this?" she mumbled, and spat the thing in her hand.

And then her heart caught on her neck, when she looked at the silver ring she was holding.

"What's that supposed to mean, Lupin, is that some kind of a twisted Marauder prank?" she asked in a shaking voice. "For I honestly hope that is not what it is!"

He casually looked at his nails. "You know, it seems like I have just asked you to marry me, unless you have something better to do the following days, of course."

******Always know sometimes think it's me, but you know I know and it's a dream.****  
****I think I know of thee, ah yes, but it's all wrong.****  
****That is I think I disagree.**

Her lavender eyes were wide open with surprise, as she looked at him, and he thought of waving his hand in front of her face so she would move, but then, quite unexpectedly, the man had to admit, she threw herself on top of him, kissing him, causing him to fall on the ice-cream bowl.

"That means yes?" he struggled for some oxygen.

"Your bottom is currently covered in ice-cream and that sounds quite delicious, so yeah, that's basically the main reason for me to want to bloody marry you!" she teased.

Remus Lupin smiled and kissed her again.

Oh yeah, strawberries...

******Let me take you down, 'cause I'm going to Strawberry Fields.****  
****Nothing is real and nothing to get hung about.****  
****Strawberry Fields forever.****  
****Strawberry Fields forever.****  
****Strawberry Fields forever.**


	2. Something in the way

**Thank you so much for your reviews! You don't know what they mean to me! I hope you like this chapter, song is Something by The Beatles.**

**Please review!**

Nymphadora Tonks stared at her reflection on the mirror of her childhood bedroom, and scrunched up her face. Her hair turned into a pale shade of blond. _How charming and glamorous… _she thought bitterly. _I look just like aunt Narcissa, or Fleur, only my skin is kinda green! _She scrunched up her face again, when the door opened, and surprised, she stumbled on the hem of her wedding gown. It was Andromeda Tonks and Molly Weasley, who were getting along just perfectly. _Of course they are, _she thought and snorted, as the image of Molly scolding her grown-up son , Bill, for his hairstyle, filled her mind. _ A pair of overprotective mothers who enjoy getting on their children's nerves. _

"Be careful, Nymphadora," said an already teary Andromeda, who was wearing an emerald silk dress. "You'll destroy my wedding gown if you don't watch that clumsiness of yours!"

"I'll be careful if you stop calling me that!" she protested. "I look like a snobbish Black, with all this bloody satin around me!"

Her mother looked offended. "Nonsense. _I'd _never been a snobbish Black, nor had my gown!"

"But it doesn't suit _me!" _

"It suits you perfectly." Said Molly Weasley with a proud smile. She was wearing a maroon paisley printed dress. "But _pink hair_, dear? Really?"

"I haven't settled on it yet, Molly." The door opened and Fleur Delacour burst in the room, in her puffy silver gown. "Oh yes, Tonks, you should defeeneetely change zat hideous shade of peenk!"

_Alright then, _thought Tonks annoyed, _pink it is! _

Andromeda waved her wand and produced an elegant flower bouquet, then handed it to her daughter. She accio'd a handkerchief and wiped her eyes, leaving a sob. "I can't believe it! My little Nymphadora, getting married, leaving home!" Tonks made a face at the sound of her first name and patted Andromeda's shoulder awkwardly. "Now mum," she said in a tired voice, "I left home six years ago!" She turned to Molly Weasley for help, only to find she was also crying. She took the used handkerchief from Andromeda and blew her nose noisily. "Who'd tell me that the troll leg umbrella stand would be the beginning of such a wonderful romance!"

Tonks rolled her eyes. "Fleur, will you take them downstairs, please?"

Fleur escorted the two women outside, while Andromeda shouted "Don't you dare come downstairs with pink hair!"

Nymphadora Tonks sat on her bed, massaging her temple. She was getting married in half an hour to the man she loved and all she wanted to do was to throw up. Her flowery bun was pink, and she decided to keep it that way. Her poor clumsy feet were already complaining in her white stilettos and her stomach was all messed up. _Imagine me prettily vomiting on the classy wedding gown of my mother's! Maybe someone should alert Remus on time, so he could dump me now, before it is too late!_

The door opened and she was ready to defend her hair again, but it was only Ginny and Hermione. She sighed in relief as Hermione glanced at it disapprovingly, but said nothing. Both girls looked stunning, _way better than my green mask of a face_, she thought, in their purple short tulle bridesmaid dresses –much to Molly's shock. Ginny had added a pair of high heels, which made Tonks regret once again not having Harry in her wedding.

"What a beautiful wedding dress!" sighed Hermione.

"I hate it!" groaned Tonks. "White looks terrible on me."

"Indeed it does." Said Ginny skeptically. "Besides, white is quite hypocritical, considering that Tonks has obviously been banging the professor."

"Ginny!" cried Hermione in horror. Tonks blushed, but couldn't help thinking that her friend was right. "It doesn't even look like me!"

Ginny thought for a few seconds, then touched the gown with the tip of her wand. A long layer of violet tulle covered the skirt, and lace in peach, blue and pastel green covered the bust. Hermione brought her hand on her mouth. "What did you…"

"Calm down, Hermione! It's _her_ wedding after all!"

Tonks whistled. "Thanks, Gin! That's bloody amazing!"

"We should go, Tonks. Come on, the wedding's about to start any minute now!"

Tonks nodded, feeling her stomach ready to empty its content on her heels. "Sod it!" she finally snorted, as threw them of her feet, accio'ing her pink boots.

Remus Lupin wished he wouldn't have to get married in his dress robes, he was already sweating and they were old and faded enough to embarrass him. They could even be considered as vintage.

"Hey, Remus!" whispered Fred –or was it George? It was impossible to recognize them in their identical striped top-hats- behind him. "Do you think Tonks has changed her mind?"

"Or more likely, forgotten the date?" said the other twin.

"That's enough!" hissed Bill, and punched his brothers on their shoulders.

"You can never trust Tonks!" growled Mad-Eye. "That girl always puts her wand on her bottom pocket! You can never trust women in general, actually! CONSTANT VIGILANCE!"

"Thank you, Mad-Eye, that'll do." Mumbled Arthur Weasley, who was the best man.

Remus sighed. He was feeling so weird, even scared. How he wished his friends were there. He felt a lump on his throat when he thought of James and Lily being present at his wedding, as they should be, together with their son. He was extremely guilty that Harry had not been invited, but it was impossible, during the war. Then, his mind flew to Sirius, and he felt even worse. If he owed it to somebody that he was getting married, that would be Padfoot. How he missed his friends… How he'd love to see the prank the old bastards would have prepared especially for the day… Probably jinx the bouquet so it would sing Abba in a shrieking voice, or something like that.

He drifted out of his thoughts when the magic instruments started playing, and he saw her walking on the yard, holding her father's arm. His heartbeat raced. That was his woman. He thought, smiling. Pink hair and a multicolored dress on her wedding day, Andromeda would probably get the shock of her life! He took a glimpse of her well known pink army boots under the long hem, and managed to hold his laughter. Only once had he seen her wearing heels, and as far as he could recall, the night had ended up with a waiter throwing soup on a fat lady, and the two of them running barefoot in the rain.

**Something in the way she moves,****  
****Attracts me like no other lover.****  
****Something in the way she woos me.****  
****I don't want to leave her now,****  
****You know I believe and how.**

As she stumbled twice, and regained her balance, he couldn't help but think how unique she was. As she left Ted Tonks' hand and stood next to him, he couldn't help but think how beautiful she was. And as she turned and smiled at him under her lilac lipstick, he couldn't help but think how much he adored her.

"Remus John, do you take Nymphadora Andromeda to be your wife? Do you promise to be true to her in good times and in bad, in sickness and in health, to love her and honor her all the days of your life?"

He turned to her, waiting to see her reassuring smile, but instead she faced a face with a chicken beak staring at him. He tried not to laugh hysterically. "I do." He said at last.

"Nymphadora Andromeda…"

"Excuse me, mister, but it's Tonks." Fortunately her mouth was now normal.

The vicar looked puzzled. "Fine… do you take Remus John to be your husband? Do you promise to be true in him in good times and in bad, in sickness and in health, to love him and honor him all the days of your life?"

"I abso-bloody-lutely do!" she grinned widely.

The poor vicar sighed. "I do pronounce you husband and wife!"

Tonks turned to kiss Remus, but he was faster than her, and grabbed her in his arms, causing everybody to applaud and the twins with Ron to whistle.

**Somewhere in her smile she knows,****  
****That I don't need no other lover.****  
****Something in her style that shows me.****  
****I don't want to leave her now,****  
****You know I believe and how.**

"You look gorgeous, Nymphadora", he said, breaking the kiss, while sitting on their bed on her flat.

"Don't you dare call me that, Remus John Lupin, you very well know that I might hex you!"

"You can't expect me to call you Tonks now, can you?"

"What will you call me, then? Sweetie-pie?"

"Pixie-nymph?" he chuckled.

"I dare you. I double dare you."

"Your name will be a slight problem for us, you know…"

"Will it threaten our marriage?"

"Doubtfully. But it might threaten your mood."

**You're asking me will my love grow,****  
****I don't know, I don't know.****  
****Stick around, and it may show,****  
****But I don't know, I don't know.**

"I wish he was there… Sirius…" she smiled nostalgically.

"I do too, love."

"Do you think he was watching us from somewhere?"

"He certainly was, laughing at my fading dress robes and admiring your rebellious self, what with the hair and boots. He must have been proud for his little cousin!" he slowly unbuttoned the colorful dressing gown, resisting the urge to rip it in a million pieces.

"Do you think he's still watching us?" she asked seductively, as she moved her wand and made his dress robes undone.

"I hope he isn't, or he won't be very happy for what I'll do to you!"

"Or he'll just get popcorn and make himself comfortable."

"I'd rather not think about it." He nuzzled on her neck, softly biting it.

"Why, Mr. Lupin, what are you planning to do to me?" she caressed his shoulders and chest, and her hands moved lower, on his abdomen and hips.

"Let's say… the Marauders would be proud of their werewolf friend." His hands travelled over her corset and slight curves.

"Their beast friend, I'd much rather say." She unbuttoned his pants.

"If you think it's better that way…"

He moved his wand. "Nox." The lights went away.

"May I call you Dora?" he asked, as his lips made their way to her pale bare chest.

She thought for a while, and smiled in the dark. "You may." He pulled her to a powerful kiss. "Thank you, Mr. Lupin." She said breathlessly, when breaking it and getting on top of him.

"For what, exactly?" he asked in a husky voice.

"For loving me."

"Thank you, Mrs. Lupin."

"For loving you?"

"For existing."

**Something in the way she knows,****  
****And all I have to do is think of her.****  
****Something in the things she shows me.****  
****I don't want to leave her now.****  
****You know I believe and how.**


	3. What kept you?

**I really don't know how to thank you for your support! Your reviews make me feel amazing, I am so glad I have found this community! If you have any suggestion of your own fics you want me to read, feel free to tell me, I'd be more than happy too!**

**I actually hate this chapter, I know it's boring as I don't really enjoy writing chapters that have to do with the real plot. I apologize and I promise of more fun coming in the next chapters!**

Harry opened the door of Privet drive's 4. Tonks got in the house, smiling. Remus was behind her. He was tired, as the full moon had just passed. Tonks noticed his face lighting when he saw Harry. She knew that Remus felt really protective over him. Everybody said hello, and they went in the kitchen. Tonks climbed on the washing machine, looking at it in enthusiasm. She remembered one of those, at her aunt's house.

Harry stared at everybody. He turned at Kingsley Shaklebolt.

"Kingsley, I thought you were looking after the Prime Minister?"

Kingsley shook his head. "He can get along without me for one night. You are more important."

Tonks showed her ring to Harry. "Harry, guess what?" she said, smiling.

"You got married?" he said, in surprise, and looked at Remus.

"I'm sorry you couldn't be there, Harry, it was very quiet." He answered, feeling a guilt rushing in him again, mixed with a sudden need for his wife, who was sitting opposite him, and was moving her beautiful legs back and forth teasingly. He couldn't help thinking what was under the dark green stockings.

A little later, Ron was grabbing Tonks' waist, on the broomstick. Remus shot them a last glance, earning a reassuring smile from her.

Remus and George took off. Remus was feeling the tight grip of the boy on his back, when wind was punching him in the face, and made his hair get in his eyes. His heart was pounding quickly, but he was ready for whatever would happen. His wand was in the front pocket of his robes, and he hoped he wouldn't have to use it. Suddenly, he heard George's voice in his ears.

"Remus, behind us!"

Lupin, turned around immediately, and saw more than two dozens of Death eaters. He considered speeding up and get away from them, but the next second he realized that was stupid. He turned the broom immediately, trying to get away from a killing curse. He had raised his wand, like George. A masked woman tried to stun him, but Remus managed to deny the curse, and turned to three Death-eaters who were pointing at them with their wands. He started throwing curses and protecting charms. He turned his head, and saw Harry-George stunning three Death eaters at the same moment, and throwing another one from his broom. "Good one." He shouted to him. "Hold tight."

"Everything's alright, Remus, don't worry." George said reassuringly.

Indeed, the death-eaters had started giving up. A cloud which Remus had bewitched, got between them, and decreased the visibility. Their destination was just under them. He started speeding. Suddenly, a scream was heard in his ears. He turned and faced George. From his head, which had started getting to its normal form, blood was running like a river. His neck and cloak were filled with deep red liquid. He looked right in front of him, and saw Severus Snape. His mask had fell of his head. George was about to fall from the broom. Lupin was furious. "Sectumsembra…" he whispered, and grabbed George from his waist. With his other hand, he clutched his broom, and flied as fast as he could. They had gotten away.

*8*8*8*8*

"Ronald, you don't look well-shaved." Aunt Muriel shouted. "What are you trying to look like? That loser, your uncle Jacob, who never managed to do something useful in his life?"

Ron groaned. "Aunt Muriel, will you give us the Portkey, please?"

"Hold on, young man. Don't you raise your voice to me! I want to know what is your connection with that bizarre girl with the rather eccentric hair!"

Tonks hit her hand on her forehead. Remus should have died from his worry. The same went for her parents. She looked around the room. Then she saw it. A rusty glowing oilcan, which no one had spotted. Just then, it vanished. They had lost their portkey. If they had landed in a minute before, maybe they would have managed to get it. Ron followed her eyes, and swore something that made Aunt Muriel furious. She started shouting about the younger Weasley's resemblance with ghouls and Tonks sighed. "We have to get going some way. They will be so worried."  
Ron nodded.

*8*8*8*8*

Lupin and George landed in front of the Burrow. Remus was supporting the young Weasley, and was hoping they would notice them quickly and help him. He saw them coming. Harry ran and helped him get George into the house. Molly Weasley ran to her son, pale as a sheet.

"None of the Order would have told Voldemort we were moving tonight." They could hear Harry saying. "Voldemort only caught up with me towards the end, he didn't know which one I was in the beginning. If he'd been in on the plan, he'd have known from the start I was the one with Hagrid."

Remus raised his head, as what he had heard had worried him immediately. "Voldemort caught up with you? What happened? How did you escape?"

Harry was explaining to him, and Remus deep inside, was feeling proud for him, managing to get away once again. But when he heard that Harry had tried to disarm Stan Shunpike, he got angry. Wouldn't that kid ever learn? Wouldn't he put himself once over the other people? He should really get Harry to understand the seriousness of the situation.

When the conversation was over, and they got next to George, to see how he was, Tonks came to Remus' mind. She hadn't returned yet. He shivered, trying to throw all the disturbing _what ifs _away from his mind. He sat on a chair, and everyone else in the room became a blurry image. He only hoped she was well, and that he would hold her soon. The ticking of the clock made him feel like an eternity was passing, when suddenly, he heard some people arriving at the back yard. He got up and ran. It should be Tonks and Ron. It should be. He felt relieved as he saw that it was Kingsley and Hermione, as they were alright, but his heart sank. He hoped that his wife and former student had just missed the portkey. He sighed, as everyone was next to the sofa where George was lying, and got outside, to see if someone was coming. Arthur arrived with Fred, but Tonks and Ron were nowhere to be seen. He felt Hermione joining him. His heart was pounding so quickly, he only wanted to hope, but he knew no one promised him that nothing had happened to her. He sighed, and wished, still looking at the sky. After some minutes, Harry came outside too. As he could feel the worry of the others, it was getting worse. He palms had gotten clammy. Where _were_ they?

"It's them!" came a scream from Hermione suddenly.

He saw her running in the yard. He took a breath, and felt so relieved, as she jumped in his arms. When he was able to smell gardenia on her neck again, he knew everything was just right.

"Remus!" she cried, and he just rubbed her soft hair, not speaking, wanting to suck every detail in that moment of relief.

"What kept you? What happened?" he finally said.

"Bellatrix", said Tonks. "She wants me quite as much as she wants Harry, Remus, she tried very hard to kill me. I just wish I'd got her, I owe Bellatrix. But we definitely injured Rodolphus… then we got to Aunt Muriel's and we'd missed our Portkey as she was fussing over us."

Lupin was angry. He nodded, and stopped the conversation, holding her hand tightly.

And before being able to recover, there was Bill, saying what they least expected to hear.

_Mad-Eye. Dead_. She didn't try to hold her tears. Mad-Eye was dead. Sirius and Dumbledore were already gone, and now him? What else would she have to cope with?

_Not Remus. Not Remus. She couldn't lose Remus._

She would fight so hard to manage and offer Remus a better world.


	4. Mischievious

**Now I guess it's time for a confession: I feel weird for this chapter. I really do. I had much fun writing this, but, believe me, I'm quite ashamed to post it here. It feels really personal, and I want to apologize if it's written in a stupid way.**

**Anyway, story is rated M so you've been warned :P**

**Please review!**

**Thank you so much!**

It was a hot Sunday morning. The weather had been stubbornly refusing to get any cooler, apparently having decided it would be fun tormenting a newly married couple more than the war which was going on. The bright August sun had entered the window of Nymphadora Tonks' bedroom. She was covered in sweat and the silk camisole she was wearing was sticking on her body. But there was also something else. She felt something soft and strange on the side of her breast. She was ready to curse the unidentified magical creature, probably a grindylow, that found pleasure in teasing her, but after fully waking up she turned and faced Remus Lupin's closed eyes, which made her immediately understand that that feeling had been his lips and the tip of his tongue which was still brushing on her skin. He noticed her looking at him, and opened his eyes, shooting her a teasing look, while his fingers lowered the strap of the camisole even more.

"Good morning, sunshine." He said casually. She couldn't help but notice how hot and adorable he was, what with his sandy brown messy hair falling over his –not so- innocent chocolate eyes. "Should I apologize for waking you up?"

"You should apologize for acting in such shameful, mischievous ways _without_ waking me up, Lupin." she muttered, as he lowered the strap a little more, uncovering more skin. His fingers caused her to shiver, and she considered it particularly evil of him to tease her in such a way before she had even managed to open her eyes properly. "How was last night, Remus? Are you feeling well?" She had heard his howls in the moon. It had been quite an angsty night for her, full of worry and guilt, just as every other full moon.

He made a grimace at the thought of it. "I always am tired the following morning, but having such a stunning metamorphmagus bewitching the sight of my bed doesn't do any harm, does it?" His hand traveled over the fabric and rested on her hip, and he unexpectedly took a nipple in his mouth. This action was so merciless, that it caused her to moan, totally surprised. She had already started feeling dizzy, and decided that this way of waking up was even crueler than Sirius' singing in the bathroom, or than a Death Eater who had had a quarrel with personal hygiene standing next to your bed, ready to strangle you with a leather collar.

"Remus…" she sighed, giving up on any idea of resisting, as his hands lifted the short dress and his lips moved on that sensitive spot on her abdomen. "Such an evil man, you are, Professor…" she felt his lips trailing kisses down her waist, and when they reached the line of her underwear, she almost jumped up. She couldn't see much, as his head was literally hidden under her dress. So, when she figured out that her underwear was moved aside, and that this strange, tingling, wet sensation was caused by his tongue, she gasped. She forgot to feel self conscious about the view he probably had, and opened her legs welcomingly. His hands took grip of her thighs, as he made her to moan with pleasure, with the help of his extraordinary skills. Her fingers made their way to his hair and she pulled it. He took his mouth from her and chuckled. "Take it easy, wild hippogriff!" he said. _Look who's talking,_ thought Nymphadora, but did not manage to let it off her mouth, as she gasped again, feeling her arms and legs paralyzing, when his tongue moved on her in the most breathtaking way.

She grabbed him from the shoulders, causing him to stop and raise his head, then kissed him straight on the lips, pulling off his pajama pants and pressing his torso on hers. She pulled her orange hair aside and nuzzled on her neck and collarbone. She almost fell from the bed, thank to her clumsiness, but he held her and smirked. She decided to take her revenge by sliding one hand between them, stroking his throbbing erection, feeling his heart pounding against the fabric of her night dress, which he immediately got rid of, with the help of his wand.

"I want you, Nymphadora Lupin." His voice was husky, deep and needy.

"Watch your mouth with that name, professor, or you might be punished." She whispered seductively.

"That is not certainly a bad thing, is it, now?" He placed his hands on her hips and raised her from the bed. She wrapped her legs around his waist and he pressed her against the cool wall, which felt relieving on her sweaty back. She kissed him again, while every cell of her body wanted him madly. They were both sort of breath, but it didn't matter at all. He stumbled on one foot from her weight, and she noticed.

"I hope that was a result of my contagious clumsiness, and not because of me gaining weight." She teased, as he kissed her neck. He only chuckled, and bit her. She gasped. "You really scare me when you behave like a monster." she smiled and broke the kiss, massaging his back.

"Hmm…" he mumbled, "Did nobody inform you that you were getting married to one?" He looked at her almost sadistically and then unexpectedly entered her, making her gasp in total ecstasy. He pressed her body on the cold wall and they started moving in total synchronization. Unlike the rhythm of their hips and waists, their breathing was irregular. "This is so perfect!" he groaned, pressing his lips on her throat, tasting the salty flavor of her sweaty skin. She dug her fingernails into the skin of his bag and sighed pleadingly. "More!"

He almost lost his balance because of her weight, he was dizzy enough to lose it anyway. He walked backwards and fell on the bed, still being inside her. She rode him fiercely, her fingertips trailing on his desperately moving chest. She loved being on top of him, she felt that he was even closer that way, not to mention the power that gave her. He was defenseless, her every movement sent him to heaven, it literally paralyzed him, made him forget how to speak of think properly, all he could do was ask for mercy, or just… moan. And moan he did. He knew she was reaching climax, and he was too, it was getting even more exciting, even more magical every time. Those seconds were those of pure bliss and absolute torture. She let a cry and he closed his eyes, they continued moving, her body was shaking violently, and then there was the explosion. He came inside her, leaving a trembling cry.

She curled next to him. His head rested on his chest and he stroked her hip as their breathing relaxed. She listened to his frantic heartbeat as it came back to normal. Who could call a self-playing piano or a bewitched harp magical, when a sound like this could produce such magic?

"I hope you weren't bored, Professor." She whispered in his ear.

"Completely disinterested, as you could very well notice." He joked. "I hope I didn't exhaust you. Are you planning to sleep till tomorrow afternoon?" he tried to hide his pride for his achievements.

"On the contrary, actually." She smirked. "I'm ready for a second round, if _your _old body can bear it."

He nuzzled between her breasts. "That might sound quite unfortunate to you, dear Nymphadora, but I'll never get too old for this."

She opened her mouth to protest for the use of her first name, but she was silenced with a kiss.


	5. Fine

**Please review, it will really mean a lot to me and my story! :-)**

**Thank you so much for reading!**

Nymphadora Tonks entered her bedroom, dragging two robes, a yellow and a blue one. Her hair was blond and she was wearing a grumpy expression. "Are you ready?" she asked her husband, who was fixing his messy hair in the mirror. "Harry's birthday dinner's about to start soon."

He turned to face her. "Yes, I am, but apparently you are not." He grinned slightly.

"I wasn't really in the mood to get ready. Quite tired, I am. Now tell me, what should I wear?"

His eyes travelled on the green towel which was wrapped around her slightly tanned body and on her long silk legs underneath. "Nothing!" he smirked, and walked toward her. She sighed miserably, as he threw his arms around her. She felt comfortable with his musk and parchment scent in the air, but any other smell made her insides feel weird at the moment. He nuzzled on her shoulder seductively, and opened the towel, revealing her naked chest that was hidden underneath. "We'll be late, love…" she muttered.

"Come on, Harry will totally understand."

"What exactly will he understand, Remus? Are you planning to explain in detail what kept us behind?"

"Married couples need not explain everything, you know!" he kissed her neck and collarbone.

"Remus, we shouldn't right now. If you continue like that I might end up throwing up on you."

He stopped kissing her and looked at her bewildered, even hurt. "Merlin, Dora, am I that disgusting?"

She managed to laugh bitterly. "It's not you, it's just…" and with that, she covered her mouth with her hand, and ran to the bathroom, throwing her towel behind.

He quickly followed her and stood behind the closed bathroom door. "Dora!" he shouted, "what in Merlin's name is happening?" He heard water running.

"Nothing, go away!"

"The hell I'm not!" he opened the door and entered to find her throwing water in her face. "God, Dora, we're not going anywhere tonight!"

"No, no I'm fine!"

"_Fine?"_

"Really, I'm feeling better now. I probably ate something which had gone old. I'm going to get ready."

He shook his head disbelievingly. "I'll bring you your blue robes."

Some minutes later, Remus was shaking Harry's hand. Tonks looked rather cheerful, much more than before, something which even made him fear that it had been his fault. It was his turn to start feeling miserable. He was very happy seeing Harry and the Weasley's, but after receiving the limiting regulations for half-breeds, he was feeling slightly odd and uncomfortable every time he was out with people.

Nymphadora was now chatting with Bill Weasley. Her hair was long, something that happened rarely, brown and thick. She wondered why they weren't taking a chair. They had been there for almost five minutes. Molly was now having a conversation with Apolline Delacour, but Nymphadora noticed her repeating glances at the gate. Then, she realized who she was looking for. Arthur wasn't there. She walked to her husband and passed her arm on his back, caressing him softly. Then, her hand got lower to his hips. "Dora!" he whispered warningly. "What are you doing?" She just giggled.

"I think we'd better start without Arthur." The heard Molly saying. "He must have been held up at –oh!"

A bright silver weasel patronus appeared. "Minister of Magic coming with me." It said.

Remus Lupin's heart started racing. The ministry. The image of the bright red Limiting Regulation parchment came to his mind. He immediately turned to face Tonks. She was already looking at him worriedly, biting her bottom lip. He grabbed her wrist, and she immediately understood in that way they could always communicate without words. They climbed over the fence and disapparated. Tonks rushed and unlocked the door of her apartment. They entered, and Remus slammed the door behind him, breathing heavily. They examined themselves. Their hair was now messy, and Tonks had a little cut on her ankle, from climbing over the fence. He pointed his wand on her, and it was healed.

"Sorry for spoiling your evening." He muttered, avoiding her gaze. "I hope you understand."

She smiled. "Don't worry for me, Remus. It's fine. I'm sure Harry'll understand too." She started unbuttoning her robes, as her hair turned pink. "Maybe, maybe it's better that we had to come back after all…" she whispered seductively in his ear, sitting behind him, blowing warm air on the back of his neck. "We had left something unfinished."

He sighed, as the images of Arthur's patronus and of the red parchment filled his mind. He was unwanted. "Not now, love."

"What?" she said disappointed. "Are you not in the mood? Maybe you ate the same thing as me?"

"I've… I've made you an outcast. You aren't free to go anywhere, because of me. I have spoilt your name."

She snorted. "My name? My father is a muggleborn, and my job is not particularly appreciated by the current ministry. Just don't worry about this crap, alright?"

He nodded miserably. She placed her thumb under her chin and caused him to turn around.

"I love you." She smiled.

"I love you too." He finally grinned. That was what mattered.

She pulled him into a gentle kiss, and he chuckled, while holding her, sucking into her perfect gardenia scent.


	6. The Greatest News and The Worse Timing

**Please review, it will really mean a lot to me and my story! :-)**

**Thank you so much for reading!**

Bill and Fleur's wedding had definitely been a success. Tonks was smiling while swaying in her husband's arms, and he didn't seem to mind for her stepping on his feet and losing her balance. She was wearing a crazy printed puffy dress with her beloved vintage cowboy boots. "You look stunning", he whispered softly in her ear, making her grin stupidly.

"We didn't get to dance at our wedding."

"Indeed we did not. We should thank Bill for giving us the chance."

"We can dance home too, you know, if you want of course. Without many clothes on!"

"Doesn't sound bad!" he tried to hide a smile.

She felt her feet leaving her and he managed to catch her just in time.

"For Merlin's sake, watch that clumsiness, Dora!" he said bemused.

"I just got dizzy for a moment there…" she muttered.

"Dizzy?" he looked alarmed.

"I'll just… go and find Molly for a while, if you don't mind. I'll be back soon!"

He nodded and headed to their table, feeling confused.

Molly was looking a little drunk. Her hat was dangerously falling over her one eye and she was dancing with Arthur, quite vibrantly. Tonks smiled when she saw them. They were definitely an example of a happy couple, even when Arthur did crazy things with Muggle rubbish, even when Molly was being a quite loud overprotective mother. The song ended and Arthur walked to Fleur's father, who had some questions concerning the wine. Molly shot a disapproving look at the twins for flirting with Fleur's French cousins, and Tonks took the chance to make her way towards her.

"Hello, Tonks dear!" smiled Molly, pouring some Veela gin in her glass. "Are you enjoying yourself? Where is Remus?"

"I'm having a great time, Molly! Remus is currently tasting some of your perfect stew, he will never get over it! He'll have to get used to the idea I'll be burning it!"

Molly laughed. "You are more than welcome to eat at the Burrow anytime you wish, you already know that!"

"Thank you! Congratulations again for Bill! He seems really happy!"

The older woman sighed. "Can you believe it? Bill, my little boy, getting married!"

"It's a marvelous wedding! Molly, could I have a word for a minute? If you are not busy, of course!"

She shook her head, causing her hat to tremble. "Sure, just follow me to the kitchen!"

They walked to the Burrow together. "I hope there isn't something wrong with the Order… or with Remus…"

"No, not at all, I just worry… I assume something is strange with… me…"

They entered the Burrow. "What can be wrong, Nymphadora?"

"Don't call me that! Well," she took a deep breath, "I've not been feeling really well lately, and I thought you, most of all people, would know…"

Molly brought her hand to her mouth, sign she had very well understood. "Oh my goodness, that's amazing!"

"I just… I'm not sure yet!"

"Come on," said the Weasley mother soothingly, and pressed Tonks' shoulders so she was seated on a chair. "Just relax!"

_Easy to say it! _Thought Tonks, the idea made her whole body shake and her heart to race frantically. She hadn't allowed herself to feel happy yet, all she could feel was worry. Molly Weasley pulled her wand from her pocket and waved it around Tonks. They waited for a few seconds which seemed like centuries, and then a yellow smoke appeared from the tip of her wand, and drew a circle which covered Tonks' chair like a ring. She left a small shriek and pulled the girl in her motherly hug, which smelt of powder. "Congratulations! These are the greatest news!"

"How do you think he'll take it?" Nymphadora Tonks could not believe that this tiny trembling voice she heard was coming out of her own lips.

"Remus is a responsible, caring man! I'm sure he'll be excited! Don't you worry about him! Are you going to tell him now?"

"Yes." She lied, feeling her cheeks flushing.

They headed back to the garden where the party was taking place, Molly with a huge smile and Tonks with her heart unable to stop pounding in her ears.

As they got closer to the party, it was like everything started happening in slow motion, as if Nymphadora was not starstruck enough already. A silver patronus in the form of Kingsley's lynx one, landed on the dance floor, and spoke in a loud, deep and slow voice.

"_The Ministry has fallen. Scrimgeour is dead. They are coming."_

Everything and everyone went silent for a few seconds. The atmosphere was frozen, not even the guests' breathing could be heard. The protective charms of the Burrow had just broken. Then, everybody raised their wands and she realized she should do the same. Her auror self thankfully took control of the situation and brought her back to reality. She felt Remus appearing next to her, grabbing her elbow. "Protego!" they both shouted, but they couldn't do much more. Remus' frantic eyes scanned the room for Harry. He finally took a glimpse of him, disapparating with Ron and Hermione. He could only sigh in relief, before the flying figures of a dozen cloaked people entered his optical field. They were already used to that… Before they could take a single breath, they found themselves fighting, and lights were passing near them. Tonks protected Fleur's sister from a curse and turned to face Rookwood. Before he was able to do anything, she stunned him, and pointed her wand at a short masked witch with. Remus could see many guests disapparating, including Elfias Doge and Xenophilius Lovegood, who took his complaining daughter with him, without her will. He spotted Arthur fighting with Lucius Malfoy and Bill with Snape. Then, his glance fell on a dozen Death-Eaters disapparating, probably after realizing that Harry was not there, and ready to find him. He noticed Molly who had climbed on a chair, furious that her son's wedding was spoiled, shooting curses to several Death-Eaters. "Look who's here!" he heard a hiss in his ear, and recognized that filthy stinky breath without even having to turn around.

"Greyback!" he said slowly, pointing at the werewolf with his wand. "I wouldn't exactly say that I'm glad to see you here. I've heard about your process, killing new-borns now, aren't you? Very brave of you!"

"I've heard about yours!" snorted Fenrir Greyback. "Trying to make your unimportant tiny being to feel worthy by opposing to the Dark Lord… Banging a little bitch with crazy hair… I have to admit I'd never expect you to do that! But don't worry, I'll get to… _play_ with the girl too after finishing with you. " He bared his teeth, but was hit with a spell which made him lose control for a while. Remus knew that it was permanent, but at least it would give him time to help the others.

Tonks looked around, alarmed, desperately craving for her aunt, she found herself needing to find her, and take revenge for Sirius' death. And finally, there she was, pointing at Ginny with her wand. The girl was kneeling on the ground, still resisting proudly between her screams.

"The cruciatus curse…" hissed Tonks. "Your favorite!"

"Tell me where Potter is, if you want to live another day, you ignorant, mindless Weasley girl!" the crazy woman was screaming! "

"I wouldn't tell you even if I knew!" growled Ginny, and then her body was stretched abnormally again, throwing her into an insane rush of pain. Tonks rushed next to the girl. Fortunately enough, Bellatrix noticed her favorite niece and left Ginny alone, gasping in pain, as her terrified mother quickly made her way to her.

"Hello, hello, my beloved little niece!" Bellatrix offered her a toothy smile. "Don't you think you have embarrassed our family a lot by marrying that abomination, even more than my _disgusting _whore of a sister, who ran away with that mudblood?"

"Don't you _dare _catch my parents in your mouth!" she raised her wand but Bellatrix Lestrange was faster. Tonks felt herself tripping over her feet, as a spell hit her, and her wand flew from her hand and landed two meters away, on the ground, just like its owner. She was completely exposed.

"At least you and your wolf must not _breed. _I think it is my duty to stop that, by making you unable to, by _killing you!" _She laughed insanely, ready to throw her a curse. But then, at the same moment, Remus jumped between them and saved her, keeping her closer to the ground. The witch laughed again. "Well well well," she slurred, "that's true love now, isn't it? It doesn't matter, better kill two than one, that's what I always say!"

Remus raised his wand, but everybody stopped fighting, when they heard the well known, slow but loud voice that belonged to Severus Snape. "Apparently, the boy isn't here. We're leaving."

Lucius and Arthur were the only ones who were still fighting. "You can't tell me what to do, Snape!" hissed Bellatrix and turned to her victims once again.

"I can, if you don't want the Dark Lord to know you have been disobeying his orders. Come. _Now."_

And then, surprisingly enough, the Death-Eaters started disappearing.

Apart from Ginny's shock and several minor injuries, everyone appeared to be fine. Remus gathered his wife's wand from the ground and then grabbed her hand. They apparated outside her parents' apartment. She didn't need to tell him, he had thought himself that they could be in danger. When they arrived outside the house, with a pang on her chest, she realized that her husband was right. The door was opened and they could see spell lights from the inside. They entered quickly, with their wands raised. It was so stupid, so cruel… why were they there? Ted and Andromeda weren't even in the Order.

The first thing they noticed was Rookwood and another female Death Eater waving their wands like they were directing puppets. Then, they turned their heads and saw Ted and Andromeda being tortured. The Death-Eaters wanted to know where Harry was, as if they knew. The fight with them wasn't difficult, they left in little time, but that sight would definitely be the most horrible memory in Nymphadora Tonks' life.

She was pale and speechless when they Disapparated home, probably still shocked from the battle and from seeing her parents being under the Cruciatus curse, her face looked tired, her dress was ripped and she was trembling next to him. When he unlocked the door with his wand, she just stood there for a while with a blank expression, and then, without a warning, ran to the bathroom, and threw up violently. He ran after her, took her hair from her face and helped her throw some cool water on it. Before he was even able to realize, they were both kneeling on the cold bathroom floor, and she was sobbing and shaking inside his arms. He was feeling extremely worried, but knew she wouldn't exactly appreciate him fussing over her at the moment. He just placed his one arm under her knees, and lifted her up. She snuggled safely in his robes as he moved her to the bed. She laid there shaking for a while, clutching on him, and then fell asleep.

**I also have a new one-shot, about their first time. It's called Before I go. If you want some bittersweet hotness, go on and read this. I'd really appreciate your opinions!**


	7. The Wrong Thing to Say

**Thank you so much for your reviews! They are really important for me! I hope you like this chapter:)**

He was woken up by the first stray sunrays which entered the bedroom, but she was still asleep. He got up and headed to the kitchen. Her reaction last night after the battle, was one he had never witnessed coming from her in the past, he thought, while making himself a cup of coffee. She had totally frightened him. She was an auror, used to that kind of situations just as used as he was to transforming, and she had never before broken down like that. _Then again, I can't really say I'll ever feel fully used to transforming. _He thought that it probably was a result of seeing her parents being tortured. That was terrible enough even for him.

He walked to the bedroom, holding a cup of milk for her. She had opened her eyes. He sat on the bed. "Are you alright?" he asked seriously.

She wasn't really pale that morning, but she became now. "Yes."

"Dora, I'm worried. What's wrong with you?"

"Nothing that should worry you… in that way at least."

"What do you mean? You are sick!"

"I'm not. Not really."

"What do you know that I don't?" he asked, looking confused. "You're scaring me! I think it's my fault!"

She grinned bitterly, patting his knee. "Technically, we could say it is!"

"What do you mean?"

She felt her heart racing. She still found herself unable to believe it, she still felt faint every time she thought about it. "Moony, I'm expecting."

He stared at her blankly, not really knowing if he had not understood or if wanted to delay his understanding as much as possible. "Expecting what?"

"Quite a genius you are sometimes, professor. Expecting a baby, of course!"

Remus Lupin could swear that his heart stopped beating for a moment there. At least he was sure that his brain had stopped working. When both organs started functioning properly again, ten different thoughts crossed his mind. _Oh my God, a baby! _And _Good thing she isn't sick, _and _What will I do! _And finally _How did we let that happen?_

"Earth calls Remus! Whoa!"

He was brought back to reality. "For… for how long have you known?"

"I learnt yesterday, at the wedding. Molly confirmed my guess with the spell."

He nodded slowly, and then stared at the floor blankly. Her heart was pounding violently in her chest. It had been difficult enough for her to realize that she was carrying a new life inside her, and for some reason his reaction was making it even harder. "What's wrong, Remus?" she said softly, as her chest tightened. "Don't you… want it?"

He raised his head slowly. "How could I ever not want a baby? _Your _baby? You've just… taken me by surprise. We're in the middle of a war, Dora."

"What's the matter with that?"

"It's not exactly the ideal period to have a… a baby."

"Molly and Arthur had seven."

He smiled slightly and pulled her into a careful hug. "Maybe you are right. I just… cannot believe it!"

"I know. Neither can I."

Remus Lupin knew he was too lucky of a man to have gained such a perfect woman, especially when being a poor, old werewolf. However, he had stopped there, and had never considered of having a real, bigger family. The idea of a child sounded completely new and strange to him. It was much more than he had ever asked of. More than he had ever _dreamt _of.

"So…" she bit her lip. "Is everything alright?"

He swallowed. "Yes." He nodded. "Everything's just fine."

He just wished he would be able to feel as happy as he wanted. He found his enthusiasm unbearable during the day, and he could not stop admiring his beautiful, glowing wife, even when tired, with her baggy t-shirts and unwashed hair, he caught himself dreaming of a holding a little baby in his arms, but then, for a while, he would shiver and feel sick, just as sick as she'd been. The night that followed, he lay on his bed, with his back turned at a snoring Nymphadora. _She's probably right. _He told himself. _Look at the Weasley's. Seven children during the war, and they are all fine, a happy, loving family. _But then, an annoying voice interfered. _What about James and Lily? What about Frank and Alice? And Marlene? She was killed while she was pregnant. _The images of his beloved friends came to stay in his mind, and made a lump which took its place in his throat for the following days.

*x*x*x*x*

Remus Lupin entered the apartment and threw his patched coat on the couch, then walked to his wife's eccentric cherry-shaped mirror to bring his appearance back to normality, with his wand. He sighed. Disguising to go out was a strong sign that they were officially at war again. Half of his life had been a war and, even though that he could see that coming, he had desperately and stubbornly hope that his life wouldn't be in grave danger again. And now he wasn't alone. There was _her _life too.

Running a hand through his hair, he looked around the living room and an amused smile appeared to brighten his tired features. Those lime green polka dot things on the lamp could be nothing but socks. Also he could swear that on Nymphadora's broomstick, flying around in the house, he could see a fuchsia bra.

His wife entered the living room. She was wearing a fluffy green sweater and a baggy pair of jeans which were so torn, she could only wear in the house without having old ladies raising their eyebrows. Her hair was short, straight and brown. "Wotcher", she grinned. "Tell me the news from the outside!"

"As charming as you already know. Murders, tortures, pretty things…" he said bitterly.

She groaned. "I miss the times when I could go to work, feel a little useful by trying to catch and strangle Death Eaters… well, I never strangled one but still. It's terrible, not being able to go to work."

"But the ministry now belongs to them, Dora, so if you kept working you would practically help them..."

"I know," she sighed and sat on the arm of the color-changing sofa.

He made his way next to her. "It isn't too bad having more time to stay home after all." He mumbled jokingly, cupping her face and pulling her to a soft kiss. He felt her smiling upon his lips, and then pulled her away and looked at her, amused. "Pray tell me, darling, what exactly are your socks doing on your lamp?"

She slightly punched him on the shoulder. "They're taking a nap!"

"Is my hat snoring in the fridge then?" he kissed her again. "That's why I love you so!"

They let their backs fall on the couch and continued kissing. She was smelling differently every time and it was driving him crazy. Always the same gardenia base, but sometimes there was a little chocolate in it, some others there was leather, some others there was just _sleep, _which was his favorite scent, and some other times there was _sex _in her scent. But now, it was a totally new smell, of powder and wool… was it… motherhood?

Unconsciously his hand moved from her back to the front, and rested on her still flat belly. He was still finding himself afraid of the fact that he would become a father, but it was also an exciting, completely unique and mind taking feeling. His heart started racing as she broke the kiss and offered him a smile.

"I know it's stupid," she said shyly, "but I was thinking of some names…"

He stroked her cheek with his thumb. "Isn't it a bit early?"

"I couldn't help it."

He chuckled. "I don't think that discussing some names for our daughter will do any harm, especially considering how impatient she will be, if she takes after her mother."

"Let's hope she won't be cursed with an idiotic name like her mother's, but how do you know that the baby will be a girl, professor?"

"I don't know, I just have a feeling."

"Very well, you may go with your feeling, but I want a stubborn boy with chocolate eyes!"

"What are the boy names you've thought about, then?"

"You go first."

"Well, maybe Apollo!" he said triumphantly!

Tonks almost choked. "_What?_ There is no bloody way I'm naming my son Apollo!"

"But he was the god of music and sun…"

"He was probably a dumb ignorant guy who only cared of his blond locks! It's a ridiculous name!"

"Well, maybe it is. What were _you _thinking?"

She gave him a huge smile. "I was thinking about Ringo!"

He stared at her blankly. "Dora, I'm not sure if this is a good idea…"

"But you like the Beatles!"

"I do, I love them, but you can't call our son _Ringo!" _

"Ringo was the cutest one." She looked at him grumpily.

"If it has to be from the Beatles, why don't we call him George? He was the most quiet and sensible one!"

"That's a good idea! Not to mention how hot he was!"

Remus' cheeks flushed. "Hot? Hotter than me? I don't think I want that name for our son… I prefer thinking of him as clever and kind than hot!"

Tonks laughed heartedly and placed a peck on his lips.

"Besides," he continued, "if we have to call him after our Muggle idol, I'd call him Charles!"

Tonks made a face. "Charles Dickens was an amazing author, but seriously, _Charles_? That's a quite boring and old-fashioned name, and it reminds me of Charlie Weasley!"

Remus sighed. "This is leading nowhere. What if it was a girl?"

"I've always wanted to name my daughter Pinky!"

"_Pinky? _What does it even stand for?"

"It's from… from Pinafore, or something like that!"

"You certainly possess a certain talent of coming up with the most ridiculous names!"

"It runs in our genes." She shrugged her shoulders defiantly. Then, she heard a sound, like an unlocking door. "Did you hear that?" she asked her husband, alarmed.

"Hear what?" he was sniffling her hair. "That job of yours has made you more vigilant that necessary."

It was the wrong thing to say.


	8. The Brave Comet and the Broken Mirror

**This is quite a stupid chapter, I just had to write it for the plot. Please review, you know how happy it makes me!**

Before they could take a single breath, two Death-Eaters they had never seen before and Lucius Malfoy were standing in their living room, with their wands raised. Tonks' heart caught on her throat. They had broken the protective charms. How had they done that? She grabbed her wand and felt Remus do the same on her side. They shouted "Protego", and a huge shield was now between them and the Death-Eaters. "What are you doing in our house?" he growled.

"And what an interesting house it is!" slurred Lucius. "Certainly portrays the personality of its residents..."

"I'm quite proud of it." Shouted Nymphadora.

"How did you break the spells?"

"The power of the Ministry is now with us, if you haven't figured that out already."

"Remove yourselves from our sight." Said Remus calmly. "Immediately."

"Not so likely." Said Lucius, "unless you come with us."

She quickly turned to look at her husband. "Remus? Come with you? He's not going anywhere!"

"Should I kill the girl?" snorted the one of the Death Eaters.

"No, Connolly, she talks too much indeed, but we will show mercy if she lets that… _husband _of hers follow us without any complaints." He spat while talking.

Nymphadora opened her mouth, ready to throw a spell, but Remus squeezed her shoulder, causing her to stop. "What do you want me to follow you for?" she realized he was trying to gain more time.

"Werewolves like you have found a remarkably better fate on Dark Lord's side. If you decline, however, to follow us, you will still be executed, as every other half-breed."

"Do you think he's so stupid to go with you and die?" snorted Nymphadora.

Lucius raised his shoulders. "Well, he has to, unless he wants you to die too." The two other Death-Eaters pointed their wands at her. Remus looked alarmed. "Leave her alone!" she tried to remain calm."

"No, Lupin, unless you come with us."

One of the Death Eaters shouted "Expelliarmus!" and her wand flew in his hand. He laughed, showing his black teeth. Now she was completely weaponless.

"Watch your precious wife being killed or obey. If you do, she won't be harmed. She was faithful to the Ministry all those years, even from the wrong side. Now the Ministry belongs to the Dark Lord, and she will still have a chance…"

"I'll come with you!" Remus shouted. "You may kill me, but leave her alone."

"That's a good wolf…"

"NO!" she shouted. "The hell he isn't! Get out of here, you filthy bastard!"

"Reconsidering her behavior however, you may kill the girl." The two Death-Eaters smiled in triumph. "She's got such a big mouth. Or you may use her as you please…"

And then, out of nowhere, appeared Tonks' broomstick, with the bra still hanging from it, and hit Lucius Malfoy straight between his legs. He let a cry of pain, and Remus managed to regain control after his surprise quickly enough, to stun him. The other two Death-Eaters were ready to attack, but even without her wand, Nymphadora hadn't lost her reflexes. She grabbed an orange chair and brought it on Connolly's head, leaving him unconscious, as Remus casted a spell on the other one, which threw him on the wall, causing the mirror to fall on his head and break into a million pieces.

"That's bad luck." She said breathlessly.

"Actually brought us some good luck, as they're all unconscious. I've never seen a broomstick defending its owner in such a way before."

"I have quite a precious relationship with my Comet 360."

"And if you think that I didn't like it because it sneaked in our room when we were in bed…"

She took her wand from Connolly's hand and shouted "_Incarcerous_!" which threw ropes and tied them together, so they wouldn't be able to move when they woke up. "What are we doing now?"

He thought for a few seconds. "We're leaving." He said at last.

"What?"

"We're leaving the flat. It's not safe."

"I don't want to leave my house!"

"You have to, Dora, we're in the middle of a war! What we want and what we don't doesn't matter anymore."

She bit her lip. "You are right."

They ran to their bedroom and waved their wands quickly, packing clothes, photo albums, and every paper which would give the Death Eaters information about the Order. They ran to the door. Tonks looked behind for a last time, at the flat she had gained by herself at eighteen, at the flat where she had made love with her husband for the first time, and then they Disapparated to her parents' house.

Ted Tonks heard a knock on the door. Wondering who it could be at that time of the night, he opened it a little, holding his wand in his hand. He saw his daughter and his son-in-law standing there, with a suitcase and a big leather bag. "Where did you like sleeping when you were little?" he asked, pointing his wand at Nymphadora.

"In the dog's house." She answered, ignoring Remus' surprised look. "What was your favorite Muggle movie?"

"Casablanca." He turned to Remus. "It's alright, dad," Tonks waved her hand, "It's him. By the way, mum should answer to the door instead of you from now on, considering that you're half-blood."

He opened the door and let them inside, dragging their luggage with his wand. "What happened to you two?" he asked.

Andromeda rushed into the room. "Is everything alright?"

"Yeah", snorted Nymphadora, "if you overlook the part where Death-Eaters broke into the flat, threatening to kill us, and made us move out, then yes, everything seems to be just fine!"

Ted looked startled and Andromeda's hand came to cover her opened mouth. "I always thought that this job of yours would get you in trouble!" she said eventually.

Her daughter opened her mouth to protest, but Remus interrupted her. "It wasn't because of her. It was… me they wanted."

Silence followed. "You, Remus?" asked Ted in a breathless voice.

"Yes, they wanted me to follow them."

"Who were they? Was _she _there too?" asked a pale Andromeda.

Nymphadora immediately understood that her mother was talking about Bellatrix. She was surprised, as she almost never referred to her. "No. It was just Lucius."

Andromeda's lips became a thin line. "It's beyond any doubt that you'll stay here!"

"I wanted to ask you to keep Dora here." Nodded Remus. "But I cannot stay. I will find somewhere else. My presence will put you all in danger."

Nymphadora snorted. "Nonsense! You're not going anywhere!"

"Of course you aren't!" Andromeda shook her head. "Danger or not, you are our daughter's husband, and we're all in this together! Besides, some action wouldn't do any harm! It would be lovely if dear old Lucius came here to find you, I would show that prat how Chinese porcelain feels when thrown on his ignorant blond head! It will be of the kind that he hates the most, a muggle-made vase!"

"Under no other condition would I let you break my great-aunt's vase, Dromeda!" smiled Ted.

"Action wouldn't be the best thing at the moment, considering that Dora is pregnant." Said Remus casually. His wife bit her lip. Ted pulled the purple-haired woman in a bone-breaking hug.

"These are the most amazing news!" cried Andromeda when she regained control. "I can't believe it!"

Neither could Remus Lupin, even if he had thought otherwise.


	9. All my loving

**When it comes to Beatles, you can't simply chose one song. I have five or six favorites, but **_**All my loving? **_**Well, let's just say it's the one which makes me cry the most. **

**Sorry for the small chapter, please review:)**

Remus Lupin was very well aware of the fact that every decision he had made had been a mistake. He knew that from the moment their peace was disturbed by Death-Eaters breaking with such easiness in their house, he knew that from the moment they threatened to kill her because of him, he knew that from the moment he had become a burden for her parents too. Remus Lupin had known that all along, he had known that for two years now, every time he refused being with her. _Two years? _No, Remus Lupin had known for his whole life that he should not have a family, a wife, a girlfriend, or any person who cared deeply about him. He knew that he would put everyone close to him in danger.

What Remus Lupin couldn't recall, was how he had overcome his objections, and selfishly agreed to be with her, dragging her down to his dreadful life, threatening hers, and finally, curse an unborn child with the same, if not worse, fate. What if the baby inherited his condition? How could they have been so careless?

His head was aching, he was exhausted, but it was impossible to sleep. He managed to not toss and turn on her enlarged childhood bed, as he would wake her up. She was snoring with her mouth half open and dark purple hair all over the pillow, and he was laying motionless on his side, with his back turned on her, staring at the moonlight which was coming through the window.

In a week it would be full moon, that was one more reason for him to leave. He had taken his decision and it was final.

At first he thought about telling her. She had the right to know. After all, she was a pregnant woman. But then he decided it was for the good of her to find out herself. He knew her so well, he could easily picture the scene if he told her now. She wouldn't let him, she would cry, shout and curse, they would end up fighting, he would say all his sensible arguments, how he was poor, old, and dangerous, more than ever, and she would find some stubborn, childish reasons to try and keep him. Remus wouldn't be able to cope with it. No. He would leave quietly.

**Close your eyes and I'll kiss you,****  
****Tomorrow I'll miss you;****  
****Remember I'll always be true.****  
****And then while I'm away,****  
****I'll write home ev'ry day,****  
****And I'll send all my loving to you.****  
**

She didn't wake up when he held her warm body in his arms, she didn't wake up when he placed kisses on her eyes and forehead. He looked at her, sleeping noisily, and so beautifully at the same time, and smiled bitterly. She was smiling, not knowing that he was ready to leave her again. He gently stroked her wavy hair, and then pulled the blanket over her shoulders. She didn't wake up when he wore his robes over his shirt and trousers, she didn't wake up when he grabbed his wand, left the note on her bedside and tiptoed downstairs.

**I'll pretend That I'm kissing****  
****the lips I am missing****  
****And hope that my dreams will come true.****  
****And then while I'm away,****  
****I'll write home ev'ry day,****  
****And I'll send all my loving to you.****  
**

He couldn't fool himself. He already knew that he would miss her terribly. He knew that it would be unbearable, that it would hurt too much, him more than her. But it was enough. He had been selfish enough for much too long. He had given in his desires, and had spent the most wonderful summer of his life with her, a summer full of love and hope. It was enough, he had to act less selfishly now, he had to act for her own good.

It _would _be for her own good. For her and for the child. When he thought of their unborn child, his chest ached. Somewhere deep inside, he still felt that urge to see how it'd look, the urge to see it and hold it, the urge to challenge his heart, and see how much love it was possible to give, but he couldn't. That child would have a monster for a father, a monster who would put them all in grave danger, a monster who had already made them outcasts, abominations, a monster for whom he would always be ashamed of. Therefore, leaving was the right thing to do.

**All my loving I will send to you.****  
****All my loving, darling I'll be true.**

He didn't know if he would be away for long. He didn't know when he'd come back, or if he'd come back. He hadn't given it much thought. It was all so blurry. All he knew was that he had to get away, he couldn't breathe, guilt was killing him, and he just had to get away for a while, he needed some fresh air. He had to think. And after thinking, he knew that he should be helpful, he knew that he should fight. He would go and find Harry, offer him some help. That's what James would want him to do.

**Close your eyes and I'll kiss you,****  
****Tomorrow I'll miss you:****  
****Remember I'll always be true.****  
****And then while I'm away,****  
****I'll write home ev'ry day,****  
****And I'll send all my loving to you**

Remus Lupin quietly walked across the living room door. Ted was sleepless too, he was inside, watching football on the television_. _His heart raced, and he thought it would give him away, but the older man didn't notice him. _Coward! _Said a tiny voice in his head. _No. _He thought. _I cannot possibly be a coward. I left my comfortable bed to find Harry, to fight._ Remus knew that he couldn't apparate, it would be too noisy. He walked to the door and casted _Alohomora. _Fortunately, the door wasn't creaky. He walked outside, and closed the door behind him. No one had noticed him leaving.

_Coward! _That voice said again. Remus Lupin ignored it, and Disapparated.

**All my loving I will send to you.****  
****All my loving darling I'll be True.****  
****All my loving All my loving ooh****  
****All my loving I will send to you**


	10. Coward

**Boring, boring, absolutely boring, I know! It's just that I had to write this chapter from Remus' POV.**

**Please review! Thank you for reading!**

Remus Lupin had to apparate exactly on the first step of Grimmauld Place number 12, as a Death Eater had been watching the place all day long. He still had not realized that he has left her –_them- _behind, he blocked his mind from coming in terms with that. The fact that he would see Harry and his friends any minute now, was giving him a hint of wild joy, and impatience. His decision had been taken. He was ready to help James' son, feel helpful to the wizarding world and forget his situation for a while.

He entered the house, and comforted Moody's voice, saying that he didn't kill Albus Dumbledore. The jinx broke, and as he saw Harry with his wand raised, his heart kicked. "Hold your fire, it's me, Remus." He said.

"Oh, thank goodness", said Hermione with a tired voice. She shut Mrs. Black's portrait with her wand. Harry shouted: "Show yourself." Remus went moved into the lamplight, his hands held high.

"I am Remus John Lupin, werewolf, sometimes known as Moony, one of the four creators of the Marauder's Map, married to Nymphadora, usually known as Tonks, and I taught you how to produce a Patronus, Harry, which takes the form of a stag."

Harry looked calmer now, and Lupin felt secretly proud about his vigilant reaction. He felt a forgotten warmness, being with Harry, Ron and Hermione, after all this troubled time. They walked into the kitchen. They explained to him what had happened the previous months, and asked him about the after-wedding events. The memory of that certain day was painful for Remus, but he answered them without showing his feelings.

"Well, Kingsley saved us. Thanks to his warning most of the wedding guests were able to Disapparate before they arrived."

"Were they Death Eaters or Ministry people?" asked Hermione.

"A mixture." He sighed. "But to all intents and purposes they're the same thing now. There were about a dozen of them, but they didn't know you were there, Harry. Arthur heard a rumor that they tried to torture your whereabouts out of Scrimgeour before they killed him; if it's true, he didn't give you away."

Remus noticed the shock at their expressions. He suddenly felt very tired. The conversation continued concerning the general situation, the Muggle-borns hunt, the Death Eaters, Albus Dumbledore…

He ran his fingers through his hair, hesitated for a minute, and then got straight to the point of his visit. "I'll understand if you can't confirm this, Harry, but the Order is under the impression that Dumbledore left you a mission."

"He did." Harry replied, "and Ron and Hermione are in on it and they're coming with me."

"Can you confide in me what the mission is?"

Lupin waited for an answer, breathless for what seemed like hours.

"I can't, Remus, I'm sorry. If Dumbledore didn't tell you, I don't think I can."

"I thought you'd say that." He answered, feeling disappointed. How could he ever think that Harry would give the mission away that easy? "But I might still be of some use to you. You know what I am and what I can do. I could come with you to provide protection. There would be no need to tell me exactly what you were up to."

It was Hermione who spoke next, and before she could even open her mouth, Remus knew what she was going to ask. His fears got affirmed. "But what about Tonks?"

"What about her?" he asked, forcing his voice to sound casual, as if it wasn't a big deal.

"Well, you're married! How does she feel about you going away with us?"

He felt a sharp pang in his chest. "Tonks will be perfectly safe. She'll be at her parents' house." If she only knew, Hermione would say he was right.

"Remus, is everything all right… you know… between you and…"

"Everything is fine, thank you". The sorrow of the previous hours filled him again immediately. He needed to hold Nymphadora in his arms, he felt so unsafe and torn without her. Anyway, why did it even matter? His life was already destroyed, far before he had left, far before he had even agree to be with her. "Tonks is going to have a baby."

"Oh, how wonderful!" cried Hermione.

"Excellent!" said Ron with a big grin.

"Congratulations!" said Harry, and made Remus feel sick in his stomach. He wondered if finding the kids was a good idea after all, he wished that he would be alone somewhere, alone with a not functioning brain. He tried to bring the conversation back to the previous issue.

"So… do you accept my offer? Will three become four? I cannot believe that Dumbledore would have disapproved, he appointed me your Defence Against the Dark Arts teacher, after all. And I must tell you that I believe we are dacing magic many of us never encountered or imagined."

Harry's expression changed in a way that Remus could not explain. "Just… just to be clear. You want to leave Tonks at her parents' house and come away with us?"

"She'll be perfectly safe there, they'll look after her. Harry, I'm sure James would have wanted me to stick with you." He noticed that he sounded defending.

"Well, I'm not. I'm pretty sure my father would have wanted to know why you aren't sticking with your own kid, actually."

Lupin gulped. Those words had cut him like a sharp knife. He couldn't stand thinking of that kid… _his _kid. How would it feel, how would it turn out to be? "You don't understand." He managed to whisper.

"Explain, then."

"I… I made a grave mistake in marrying Tonks." He wished they would understand, but even he couldn't. "I did it against my better judgment and I have regretted it very much ever since."

"I see. So you are going to dump her and the kid and run off with us?"

He felt blood filling his head, and got up. "Don't you understand what I've done to my wife and my unborn child? I should never have married her, I've made her an outcast!" He kicked the chair. "You have only ever seen me amongst the Order, or under Dumbledore's protection at Hogwarts! You don't know how most of the wizarding world sees creatures like me! When they know of my affliction, they can barely talk to me! Don't you see what I've done? Even her own family is disgusted by our marriage, what parents want their own daughter to marry a werewolf? And the child… the child…" He couldn't bear the thought. He felt like smashing his idiotic head on the wall so that he wouldn't be able to think about that anymore. "My kind don't usually breed! It will be like me, I am convinced of it… how can I forgive myself, when I knowingly risked passing on my own condition to an innocent child? And if, by some miracle, it is not like me, then it will be better off, a hundred times so, without a father of whom it must always be ashamed!" His voice was trembling. At least he had said what had to get out of him.

"Remus", whispered Hermione, "Don't say that… how could any child be ashamed of you?"

"Oh, I don't know, Hermione. I'd be pretty ashamed of him." Said Harry, and immediately looked shocked with his very own words.

That hit him like a punch in the stomach. He stood there, breathless, trying to realize what he had just heard, and how surprisingly _right _it sounded.

"If the new regime thinks Muggle-borns are bad, what will they do to a half-werewolf whose father is in the Order? My father died trying to protect my mother and me, and you reckon he'd tell you to abandon your kid to go on an adventure with us?"

Remus felt mad, furious. "How… how dare you? This is not about a desire for… for personal glory… how dare you suggest such a…"

"I think you're feeling a bit of a daredevil. You fancy stepping into Sirius' shoes." He ignored Hermione's interruptions. "I'd never have believed this. The man who taught me to fight Dementors-a coward."

Lupin raised his wand quickly, feeling his cheeks flushing, his heart racing, and his stomach curling. He had never felt worse in his life. A loud bang was heard, and the next moment, crazy with despair and shame, he disappeared into the night. Images of James and Lily with baby Harry, of Sirius, Molly and Arthur, filled his head, and were immediately replaced by her face, her beautiful pale face, surrounded by lifeless, mousy brown hair. Harry had been harsh. But he had been right. Remus Lupin had deserved every little word.

_Coward! Coward! _Remus Lupin nodded and walked away, as sobs started shaking his body, again after all these years.


	11. Fool on the Hill

"But you had known, Nymphadora… We had warned you about… you know, marrying a werewolf."

"The matter isn't Remus being a werewolf, mum!" yelled the woman with the mousy brown hair and the dark circles under her eyes. "And don't call me Nymphadora! The reason he left was… to protect me! Besides, don't tell me _your _parents accepted _your _choice of man!"

Andromeda Tonks shrugged her shoulders. "At least your father never left _me_."

Nymphadora Lupin neé Tonks turned her head away to hide the tears which were filling her eyes again that day. She was angry, furious. Furious with her mother, who kept saying her own things, furious with herself, who had let him go again without realizing anything, furious with _him. _How could he even do that to her?

"Now, now, Meda, don't be so harsh on the poor lad. Those news were quite unexpected even for us. Remus is a good man."

"I didn't say otherwise. He's just…"

"…a werewolf." Said Nymphadora in a sarcastic, broken voice.

"No. He's a good man, just not the best you could have chosen to marry."

"Just leave me alone, won't you?" yelled Nymphadora, and ran upstairs to her childhood bedroom.

Andromeda made a disapproving noise with her tongue. "She hasn't changed at all since she was a teenager, has she?"

"Indeed she hasn't." said Ted coolly. "But neither have you."

**Day after day,****  
****Alone on a hill,****  
****The man with the foolish grin is keeping perfectly still****  
****But nobody wants to know him,****  
****They can see that he's just a fool,****  
****And he never gives an answer **

**But the fool on the hill,****  
****Sees the sun going down,****  
****And the eyes in his head,****  
****See the world spinning 'round.**

She hugged her pillow and cried. How could he do that? How could he leave her again? How could he be just a coward? How, how, how? Why wouldn't he be just happy for the fact that he was going to become a father, why did he have to make everything harder than it really was? The problem with Remus Lupin was that he always gave much thought to everything, everything, apart what she really wanted. He always believed he knew better what was good for her, for the baby, for Harry, for everyone. If only he knew how he made her feel like… Leaving with just a note. _Going to help Harry. _Right, help Harry. Why couldn't _she _help Harry? Would she become the woman to stay behind, feeding the kid while her man was fighting for a better world? Remus Lupin could think that, if he wanted. She also knew that wasn't about Harry. That was about her, about _them. _Remus Lupin was never really able to accept the fact that they were perfect together.

Her bed still smelt of him, so did her sweater. Remus Lupin was not there. And he hadn't said if he would be coming back.

She hugged her knees let the tears fall and soak her precious note.

Remus Lupin had never felt more numb, sore and tired in his whole life. Full moon was that night, and he couldn't move from the place he had spent the day. His head was full of guilt and shame, despair and weakness. Harry's voice had not left for days. _If the new regime thinks Muggle-borns are bad, what will they do to a half-werewolf whose father is in the Order? _He forced himself to think about it again and again, seeing it as a kind of a punishment. How could he do that? Leave a little baby with no protection? How could people leave their babies? He shut his eyes in order to forget everything but in vain. There were images of James and Lily, of Frank and Alice, people who had done the right thing, unlike him. He opened his eyes again and sighed.

**Well on the way,****  
****Head in a cloud,****  
****The man of a thousand voices talking perfectly loud****  
****But nobody ever hears him,****  
****or the sound he appears to make,****  
****and he never seems to notice**

**But the fool on the hill,****  
****Sees the sun going down,****  
****And the eyes in his head,****  
****See the world spinning 'round.****  
**

Remus Lupin was a monster. He could see that at people's looks in the street, they laid their eyes on him and shivered, then walked away quickly. How could they not? With his patched and shredded clothes, unwashed and unshaven, with those terrible marks on his face. If only they knew… if only they knew how much of a monster he was on the inside, if only they knew he had left his wife and son because he wasn't brave enough to face the situation…

He was a monster. He had always known, he had always felt like one, apart from those precious times when she made him feel like a human, when she made him feel whole and worthy…

Oh, how he missed her! How he missed her scent, her laughter, her comforting touch...

**And nobody seems to like him,****  
****they can tell what he wants to do,****  
****and he never shows his feelings****  
****But the fool on the hill,****  
****Sees the sun going down,****  
****And the eyes in his head,****  
****See the world spinning 'round.**

Nymphadora Tonks had been noticing the changes the last few days. She could feel her baby growing inside her, she could feel its presence, which would make her heart race every time. It was so stunning, yet so sad. Because he wasn't there.

She would hug her stomach and cry, she would eat with her mother, she would communicate carefully with Molly, these were the only things she could do. It wasn't only that her parents wouldn't let her leave her house, it was that she didn't feel like it. She hoped that he would come back, she had even believed it for a while. Whenever she heard a noise from outside the house, she would run to the window with her heart racing, just like every time she had been waiting for his owl, a few years ago. But it never was him.

Days passed but he didn't come back.

**And he never listens to them,****  
****He knows that they're the fools****  
****They don't like him****  
****The fool on the hill****  
****Sees the sun going down,****  
****And the eyes in his head,****  
****See the world spinning 'round.**

A werewolf howled at the moon mournfully. It was a werewolf who had rejected every beautiful thing.

**Please review =)**


	12. I need you

**Chapter dedicated to **_**blurry motion**_**, the most humorous person on the internet, with the most perfectly written, hilarious Marauder fics! You should definitely check her page out!**

**This chapter is definitely one of my favorites, not only because Remus comes back and I was all happy and cheerful, but especially because I had so much fun writing Tonks! She had all the rights to be furious, and her reaction was exactly what mine would have been!**

**Song: I need you, The Beatles.**

**Thank you so much for all your reviews, you've been so kind and you've made me smile several times! Please continue reviewing, and don't hesitate to send me any links if you want me to read your stories!**

Nymphadora Tonks waved her wand and the wireless was tuned to _Potterwatch._ She made herself comfortable on her bed, as comfortable as anyone who was waiting to hear who had died during the day could be. She felt her heart hammering in her ears, that had been a quite common feeling the last days. Other names were heard, but not his. She sighed and lied down, staring at the ceiling. She had thought that she was very well familiar with the feeling of missing Remus Lupin, but she had been wrong. She didn't know it could become even worse.

**You don't realise how much I need you.****  
****Love you all the time and never leave you.****  
****Please come on back to me.****  
****I'm lonely as can be. I need you.**

He bit his lip and ruffled his hair, wishing there would be a window or something similar for him to watch his reflection. Immediately, he regretted the thought. He felt like a complete moron, with fifteen years of age, thinking the state of his hair would make her forgive him. How could she? He was certain that it would be a lost battle, but it wouldn't really matter. He would deserve it, anyway. It would be far more important for him just to see her face for a while, know that she –_they - _were alright, that would be more than enough.

_You've screwed up, mate. _He could almost hear Sirius' voice in his head, and he once again wished that Sirius was there to help him deal with it. _Coward!_ His heart raced, as he took a deep breath, and knocked to door.

The door opened slightly, and a wand poked out. "Who are you and what do you want?"

For a moment there, he was sure that his feet would betray him. He hadn't heard her voice for several days, which seemed like months, he thought that maybe that was enough, and he should go now, but a mixture of his inner Gryffindor and of the urge to see her, made him act otherwise.

"It is your husband, Remus John Lupin, I have an angled shape scar on my stomach and my favorite chocolate is Honeydukes' mint and molasses. I am a werewolf, a former Hogwarts professor, a former Marauder…" he took a deep breath, "...and an eternal git."

And right after he finished, the door was slammed shut on his face.

**Said you had a thing or two to tell me.****  
****How was I to know you would upset me?****  
****I didn't realise as I looked in your eyes...****  
****You told me.**

He waited there, startled, and the door opened after a few seconds time. Before him stayed a recollected Nymphadora, with black hair and pressed lips, holding her wand on her hip like it was a kitchen wood roller. At that moment, she was carrying a tremendous resemblance to her mother.

"Well stated, Lupin." She growled.

He had to admit that he was quite scared. He shot a glance at her stomach. "Dora… are you alright?"

"Yes," she tapped her foot on the floor, "as a matter of fact I am, despite being left alone _again, _but apart from that certain tiny deformation of the plans I had when I thought about my life, I am perfectly alright, thank you very much! Incredibly kind and thoughtful of you to _ask._"

He was unable to do any movement, or to form a proper phrase. "I'm terribly sorry." He muttered. "I've been awful."

"Good to know you are at least aware of the gravity of your acts, and of the names I have been using for you the following days. _Awful _would be quite nicely put."

"I'm not expecting you to forgive me, I just missed you so much, I deserve being punched in the guts."

She chuckled. "No, Remus Lupin. That is most certainly less than you actually deserve. What you deserve is my Comet 360 chasing you around the house, beating your abnormally stupid ass several times, but _I _will not do that, for then I'd feel deeply sorry about the poor broomstick."

**Oh yes, you told me, you don't want my lovin' anymore.****  
****That's when it hurt me.****  
****And feeling like this, I just can't go on anymore.**

There was silence for a while. "Is there anything I can do for you to forgive me?"

She finally stepped aside so he could walk inside, and she slammed the door behind them. He immediately noticed that her parents weren't in the house. "Oh no," she shook her head. "I'm afraid there is nothing _you _can do, however your _tongue _might be capable of changing my mind."

He was ready to nod sheepishly, when he realized what she had just said. "My _tongue?_"

"Yes, Remus Lupin, that wet pink thing you carry around in your mouth? It's called a tongue, and I most sincerely hope that it hasn't forgotten of its marital duties, for I shall be incredibly disappointed if it has." Her voice was softer, as she startled him again, stepping on her toes and pulling him into a needy kiss. Her hands forcefully tucked in his hair, and he pulled her body closer to his. When he was able to get over the surprise, he let her gorgeous scent fill his mind, and his arms were tenderly wrapped around her back.

**Please remember how I feel about you, I could never really live without you.****  
****So, come on back and see just what you mean to me.****  
****I need you.**

He broke the kiss. "I missed you, love", he whispered, sending a warm wave of his breath on her neck.

She kissed him again, and he felt her smirking against his lips.

"I know, bastard."

**But when you told me, you don't want my lovin' anymore.****  
****That's when it hurt me.****  
****And feeling like this, I just can't go on anymore.****  
****Please remember how I feel about you.****  
****I could never really live without you.****  
****So, come on back and see just what you mean to me.****  
****I need you. I need you. I need you.**


	13. Perfect

**This chapter was really difficult to write. I got a feeling that it is a little boring, I do apologize and I hope you'll like the following more!**

**Please review, you will make my hectic life worthy :P**

"I think I might be driven insane in here. Now I know how poor Sirius should have felt in Grimmauld Place, and mind you, _he _didn't have the incredible daily routine of a sex that I have!"

"Which could have been even more incredible if we didn't live together with your parents."

"I think it's fun, hiding in cupboards or waking up at 4 am, makes me feel like a rebellious teenager. Besides, it was your bloody idea to come here; do you think I fancy having mum fussing over me?"

"Will it make you feel better to know that we have an Order meeting on Saturday?"

"It will make me feel better to think that we'll be making plans against You Know Who, not that anybody's really optimistic lately. In terms of fun, the current Order is boring. Completely miserable without Mad-Eye, Sirius and Kreacher, if you want my opinion."

"What I miss the most it you tripping over the troll leg umbrella stand! Those had been some quite elegant entrances. They actually made me fall in love with you."

"Only these?"

"These, and your love for your first name."

He received a punch on the shoulder as an answer. "Then the soundtrack of our love must be Walburga Black's screams!"

"Lovely old woman!"

"Remus, let's go shopping!"

He nearly choked on his cocoa. "Shopping? We're in the middle of a war, we can't simply go _shopping! _Besides, most shops have closed!"

"We have to go nursery shopping! And the Weasley Wizard Wheezes are still open, for your information!"

"And what, may I ask, what will the Weasley twins provide us with which will help up create a nursery? Invisible wall paint?"

"No, but they have those cute little baby hats which transform the baby's head to an elf's!"

"Dora", he snickered, "No way am I having my daughter's head turn into an elf!"

"Spoilsport!" she snorted. "The baby won't be a girl, anyway!"

"Will be!"

"Won't be!"

"Will be!"

"Won't be!"

He laughed and wrapped his arms around her waist from behind, sniffling her neck and resting his hands on her stomach. "I don't really care about the gender. I just can't wait for the little one to come!" he mumbled. "However you are right, we should do something for the nursery. Maybe I could transform a coffee table to a crib, or something similar, as it is impossible to go out or find the money."

Her face was scrunched up at the thought of a miserable transfigured coffee table being the crib where her baby would sleep. "There must be another way." She muttered. Suddenly, her face lightened up. "I know! The furniture of my old nursery!"

He grinned. "Certainly, it'll probably be pink, perfect for our little fairy!"

She crossed her arms under her chest. "Well, Remus Lupin, if you continue to call your son a little fairy, I guess he might have to face several problems at some part of his life. Besides, it wasn't me who picked the furnishing, as I was technically a helpless tiny baby at the time. It is my mother you'll have to blame!"

He smirked at the idea of his wife ever being helpless. "Where is this furniture?"

"In the attic." She gave him an excited smile. "We can go now, Mum and Dad are asleep, I don't need her _trying to help _anyway!"

"Now, Dora?" he hesitated.

"Yes, let's go to the attic! Please!"

His Marauder self could never say no to an attic exploration. "Well, then. But it'll be your responsibility if we get bitten by giant spiders!"

"Are you a Marauder or not, Remus?"

They walked to Ted Tonks' office. She moved her wand and a ladder flew and stood under a door he just realized was on the ceiling.

"Are you going up using this?" he asked disbelievingly."

"Of course I am, why?"

"Because you're so clumsy that I don't even want to think of the consequences!"

She stuck her tongue out at him, and managed to make her way to the attic without any serious problems, apart from a broken ladder step. He climbed after her, and they closed the small door. Remus looked around. The attic was dusty and a few spiders had made their nets, but apart from that it wasn't dirty and it seemed fascinating.

"I never even knew your parents had an attic."

"You never asked."

"Should I accio your old furniture?" He turned to face her, lowering his head so it wouldn't bump on the low ceiling.

"Not so fast, let's explore a little!" she said excitedly.

Remus Lupin had to admit that he was feeling just as excited. They both kneeled on the floor, between old chests and dusty boxes, and his fingers trailed circles on her bare arm. "You know", he said in a quiet voice, "this is such a lovely place for us to get alone sometimes… I mean, your parents never come here."

She placed a peck on his lips. "Is there anything else in your mind apart from sex, Lupin?"

"Of course there is!" his hands rested on her stomach, "our baby," they moved on her arms, "your satin-soft skin," they caressed her cheeks, "those beautiful lavender eyes", and he kissed her, "and those perfect lips."

"I knew it." She snorted. "Mainly sex, that is."

"It's not my fault, you spoilt me. But now we're here for an entirely different job. Let's look for the furniture!"

Nymphadora had to admit that she was a tiny bit disappointed, after all his lips were so inviting, his graying sandy brown hair was falling on his eyes in such an adorable way, and his faded t-shirt was particularly flattering on his shoulders, but she nodded in agreement. Remus Lupin looked around. There was an old, quite tormented broomstick. "Was this yours?" he asked.

She turned and looked at it. "Yeah, that was my first broomstick. We never had a relationship as good as with my Comet though, quite stubborn it was, always dropping me off."

He smirked at the thought of his clumsy wife's first flying lessons. Her eyes fell upon a pair of leather gloves. "Wicked cool!" she whistled, and put them on. He thought that wasn't a really good idea, and he was proved to be right when her hands got fish scales. She cursed, and made them disappear with a move of her wand. "I reckon mum hasn't thrown away everything which once belonged to the Blacks!" she snorted. He found a round piece of cotton and lacy fabric, and smiled, this could not be a Black possession, it definitely belonged to a baby, probably to baby Nymphadora. He put it on his head.

"How do I look with your baby hat?"

He stared at the ridiculous sight he gave with a blank expression. "Actually, it is my christening underwear."

Remus' expression was priceless. It made Dora laugh evilly, which led to a furious tickle fight. Remus ended up thinking that her screams would wake Ted and Andromeda up. He finally accio'd the crib.

A simple wooden crib which didn't look really old, flew obediently out of a box and landed before them. It was in perfect state, considerably dusty, but nothing which could not be fixed with a wave of their wands. He nodded approvingly. "No Slytherin marks, no dark emerald, not any embellishments, I can admit that Andromeda made a wise choice for a crib."

She scrunched up her face and her hair became bright red. "I don't like it, too dull for my taste, I will probably change its color when the baby's born."

He grinned. "I trust you." He sighed, and stroked the wood of the small bed. "I still can't believe… that we'll _create _the little being which will sleep in here."

"_I _will create it actually, it was me who's been throwing up for a month and it will be me who will push a fairly huge being out of…"

"Yes, I get it." He smiled, and pulled her in his arms. "It will be you. And you'll do everything perfectly." He kissed her forehead. "Because you are perfect."


	14. Three bathrooms and a library

**This chapter will be AU but I liked to give the plot that turn. I hope you'll like it :) Please review!**

Ted Tonks waved his wand and the wireless was silenced. Everybody who was sitting in the living room remained frozen, looking at it, avoiding his gaze. Andromeda Tonks turned her pale face away and walked near the fireplace. "Did that mean…"

"They're in the area." Remus Lupin clenched his fists. "You have to hide, Ted. You refused to register as a Muggle-born."

The man sighed and ran his fingers through his fair hair. "Indeed I have to hide. I must leave."

Both his wife and daughter turned and looked at him with an identical, fearful expression on their faces. "No!" they cried.

"Don't be ridiculous, Ted, if you leave you'll most certainly get… killed!" the last word died in Andromeda's lips.

He walked to his wife and placed his hands on her shoulders. "Don't be so melodramatic." He forced a smile. "No one says I'll die if I leave. But it's beyond any doubt that I _will _die if I stay here and let them catch me."

"Can you stop saying this damn word?" said Nymphadora, as her hair turned a dark shade of red. "You won't die even if you want to! You'll stay here! You have a bloody auror in your house, I mean, free protection! Don't you see, you'll be safe here!"

He smiled and walked to her, pulling her into a hug that smelt of his favorite muggle cologne. "My little girl, I'm not willing to put you and Remus in danger! Not now, that you are going to have a baby!"

"Nonsense!" she snorted. "You will stay here."

"Dora is right, Ted. We'll come up with something, we'll hide you." Remus nodded.

"I'm afraid I must leave. You will be safer that way. _I _will be safer. I promise I will send you news."

Andromeda followed her husband upstairs, and shouted while he packed his things, but Nymphadora knew she wouldn't change his mind. Her father had always put the others' good before his own, just like Remus. Soon, they accepted his decision as they realized the danger he was in. Ted kissed his wife and daughter, and hugged Remus. "Take care of them. Please." He whispered.

Remus nodded and squeezed the other man's hand. "Of course I will. Take care of yourself."

"Don't forget to send us news." Sobbed Andromeda in her handkerchief.

"Be careful, dad." Said Nymphadora, trying to prevent her voice from breaking.

He laughed. "Don't worry about me. Everything'll be fine, I'll be back to find you with that tiny son of yours!"

Andromeda spent a few days locked in her room, she didn't even want to see her daughter. Dora's hair had returned to the mousy brown shade Remus had always hated, not because it didn't suit her, but because he knew that when she had it, she was on the verge of depression. Almost a week had passed and Snatchers hadn't paid a visit to the Tonks' house, and finally Remus realized it was bad for both their safety and for the sanity of the two women, to change scenery, and to start living somewhere else, before the Snatchers came.

"Move _out?" _was Andromeda's screaming response. "How can you ask me to move out of my own home, Remus, the home where I lived all my married years after I left the Blacks, the home where Nymphadora was born and raised? We are just fine here, we have three bathrooms and a library, I have no intention of abandoning my house, thank you very much!"

Remus should admit that he would terribly miss the library. "It isn't safe for us here, Andromeda. They already know you live here, and we are in a terrible position, they'd love to kill us all. I am a werewolf, and Nymphadora had always been a traitor, especially now that she married me, not to mention yourself. I think it's unnecessary. You know better than anybody that your actions in the past don't really support your reputation as a pure blood."

She lowered her head, a little ashamed for her outburst, knowing that her son-in-law was right.

"How will Ted find us?" she whispered. "How will he know where we are if he wants to come back?"

Nymphadora stood up. She had started to showing, and her mother hated seeing her so worried and angsty during her pregnancy. "Remus will make an announcement at Potterwatch."

Andromeda considered the possibility for a while. "Fine", she said finally. "Where are we going? Grimmauld Place?"

"We can't go there." Said Remus. "Yaxley, a Death Eater, has found out about it."

"It's not like we have the money to rent another flat." Sighed Nymphadora, at the thought of her beloved colorful flat which had been violently abandoned. The idea of moving out again in such a small period of time was really tiring, especially now that she had started getting heavier every day.

Her husband got her hand into his own, and stared at the fire, thinking. "Maybe…" he said suddenly, "maybe I have something in mind. Something safe, something cheap."

"Great." Nodded Andromeda. "Is it near the market?"

"It is in centre London, but I cannot promise you equal comfort to this house's. In fact, we'll have to settle for two rooms."

Andromeda Tonks sighed, and looked around at her modern, expensively-furnished living room. "We're in the middle of a war, after all." She shrugged.


	15. Mr Moonlight

**I know that moving out was a little out of cannon, but I just wanted to give them some privacy during these dark months before the battle. **

**Song: Mr. Moonlight, The Beatles**

**Please, review:)**

**Thank you so much!**

Remus Lupin saw his wife sitting next to him at the small wooden table, placing too warm mugs on it. Even though her jumpers were always loose and a size bigger as a fashion statement, they were now stretching uncomfortably over her round belly. Her hair was a richer chocolate shade than the mousy brown she used to have, even though it wouldn't turn her favorite bubblegum pink. He raised his eyes from his parchment and grinned apologetically.

"I never wanted you to live in a single room. I wish I had more to offer you."

Her eyes travelled around the small room with the antique wooden furniture, the tapestry cushions and the big window with the white curtains. They quickly scanned their things, her Comet 360 next to the small cupboard, her favorite, magically enlarged _Weird Sisters _t-shirt on a chair, Remus' globe with the grindylow, and finally rested on the clean, wooden crib next to the desk. She smiled. "This room is bloody amazing! Well, my flat was better, but I absolutely prefer that to my parents' house! It's so cozy and adorable! It might not be ours, but it feels like it is. Besides, it was so kind of that granny to not have us pay the rent!"

He nodded. "I used to stay here before the Order was reunited, when I moved to Grimmauld Place." He paused, as painful memories of Sirius and Dumbledore filled his head. "Old Auntie Prudence has known me since I was twenty, she had always been so kind with me, even gave me a room for the transformations. She never had children of her own, and she played a big role in my life when my mother died."

"She seems so nice and protective, reminds me of grandmother Tonks! She seems to love children, she got so obsessed with my bump! Couldn't stop talking to it like a complete lunatic!"

"I believe the baby's a reason she was so keen on having us live with her." He rolled the parchment. "Anyway, I'm glad you like it. I don't think I can say the same about Andromeda, though."

Nymphadora giggled. "I guess mom will have to get used to living without three bathrooms and a robes room!" her face became serious. "We're lucky to be there. I just wish I knew that dad was alive…"

"He certainly is. They'd announce it otherwise." He noticed her doubtful expression. "Don't worry, love, your father knows how to defend himself."

She nodded and shivered in her seat. He threw her arms around her. "Are you cold?" he waved his wand and the fire grew stronger.

"No." she said in quiet voice. "I'm scared." She pulled herself away from him. "I know I shouldn't be, I know I'm an Auror, I have fought timeless battles, I have seen death more times than many other people, I always found my job fascinating, challenging, like an adventure. I loved helping innocent people, now I can't anymore. I'm afraid of my life, of yours, of mum's and dad's, of the Weasley's, of all my friends, I am afraid and that makes me so ashamed…"

He grabbed her shoulders. "Listen here, Dora." She opened her mouth to protest. "Listen to me. You are a _human. _Fear is only normal. We all are afraid. Believe me, you have reasons to be. I've been through this before and I know what it means. The first war wasn't half as bad as it is now. Don't be ashamed."

"I don't like being afraid, Remus."

He stroked her cheek, noticing dried tears on it. "If it makes you feel better, at least know that I will never let anything happen to you, or to our baby. Do you believe me?"

She smirked. "I don't need your protection, Remus-Brave-Moony, I am the damn auror here, for Merlin's sake!"

"And I am the deadly beast, if I can recall properly."

"Then it is the duty of the both of us to take care of our baby. If of course you don't forget not to eat it."

They remained silent for a while. He continued his writing while she took a sip from her cocoa. "Do you think it will ever end? The war? Do you think we'll ever have a normal life?"

"I don't know." He said honestly. "And I don't want to think what will happen if we don't win. Listen, I've news from Harry."

She looked alarmed. "What? How?"

"Ron is at the Shell Cottage. I don't know why he left Harry, I just know the three of them are well."

"Thank Merlin." She breathed in relief. She didn't ask if Harry was doing any progress with his mission, and that was, Remus proudly realized, because like himself, she trusted the boy. "He's our only hope."

**Mr. Moonlight****  
****You came to me one summer night****  
****And from your beam you made my dream****  
****And from the world you sent my girl****  
****And from above you sent us love**

"Why don't we talk about something happier?" he asked hopefully. "Maybe… we should relax a bit, at least as long as we're in here."

She snorted. "Relax? Did Remus John Lupin just tell me to _relax_? Merlin, are you sure you're not an impostor, dear husband? Alright, here's a happier topic. What have you been writing there all day?"

He quickly waved his wand and the parchment was rolled. "Oh, nothing, you know, Order work."

"And why, may I ask, shouldn't I see Order work? Lupin, have you secrets from me?"

She reached for the parchment and her bump knocked his cocoa and it was spilt on the table. He managed to save his writing. "No, Dora, of course not!"

"Show me, then!" She stubbornly hit her foot on the floor."

"Sweet Merlin, Dora, you'll knock this room down, and it doesn't even belong to us! Fine, very well, I'm… writing a book."

**And now she is mine****  
****I think you're fine****  
****Cause we love you, Mr. Moonlight**

**Mr. Moonlight, come again please****  
****Here I am on my knees****  
****Begging if you please**

He saw a huge smile appearing on her face. "I bloody knew it!" she giggled. "What's it about? Werewolf rights?"

"Not really."

"Defence Against the Dark Arts?"

"Nah."

"Chocolate?"

"It is a novel, actually." He said, and immediately felt his cheeks flushing, as he regretted it.

"I can't believe it, Remus Lupin!" she gasped. "A _novel_? That will be interesting to read! Does it have sex in it? It surely does not."

"Who said that?" He grinned teasingly.

She laughed loudly. "Remus Moony Lupin is writing a novel with lots of naughty sex! Is the protagonist a ravishing beauty like myself?"

"It might be, or it might not."

"I have to read it!

"Not yet."

"I am your wife, you know!"

"Remember that every time that you don't want me to enter the bathroom when you're taking a bath, for some unknown reason!"

"Quakie doesn't want you to see her naked!"

"Who's Quakie?" he asked bewildered.

"My rubber duck!"

Remus was ready to answer, when a knock was heard on the door. "Come in!" said Nymphadora. The door opened and a plump, wrinkled witch with a tight white bun and a crooked nose entered the room, holding a pile of folded clothes.

"Did we make much noise?" asked Remus.

"Of course you did, but I'll be kind enough to cope with that! At least you've found a woman, John! I always thought you'd end up an old grumpy man with ten cats!"

Nymphadora tried to hide her laughter. "Well, that's what Padfoot always used to say."

"I've brought you clean robes and towels." The old woman said.

"That's so kind of you, auntie Prudence." Smiled Nymphadora. "You could have asked for my help."

"Your mother suggested the same dear girl, but you don't have to do any of these while you live in my house. It's my pleasure to finally have people around here, even dear old grumpy John!"

Remus ignored her comment and smiled. "We don't know how to thank you!"

"Oh, just deliver that baby healthy, and pray that it doesn't inherit your voice." She turned to Nymphadora. "It is a nightmare, John singing in the bathroom."

She giggled. "Oh, I know that, auntie Prudence."

"I don't wish to interrupt a happy young couple." Said Aunt Prudence, as she made her way to the door. "Dinner will be ready in an hour. You may continue whatever you were up to."

******And the night you don't come my way****  
****I'll pray and pray more each day****  
****Cause we love you, Mr. Moonlight**

**And the night you don't come my way****  
****Oh, I'll pray and pray more each day**

"What a fascinating woman!" giggled Nymphadora when she left. "Just like granny Tonks! She always used to say I'd end up an old maid if I kept wearing jeans and didn't show any leg!"

Remus raised an eyebrow. "As far as I recall, you never forgot to show those legs of yours."

"Yeah, well, when I finished Hogwarts I realized leather skirts and denim shorts suited me, not to mention that they seemed to attract older bookish professors."

"Have you met many of them?" he stood up and slowly made his way towards her.

"Not many, no. Which is a good thing, considering that rumor has it that they usually tend to seduce you and then impregnate you."

"Should the one you have met feel ashamed about confirming the rumor?" He went from her back and threw his arms around her, hands resting on the bump. His breath brushed the back of her neck and she shivered.

"Oh, he should." She whispered. "He should feel ashamed for the process which led to the confirmation of the rumor. He should also feel ashamed for making me addicted to this process." She turned around to face him and her hands slowly made their way to his hips.

"Not now, Dora. They'll be waiting for us to start dinner."

"Maybe we'll have to be quick then." She smiled.

**Cos we love you, Mr. Moonlight****  
****Mr. Moonlight**

**Mr. Moonlight, come again please****  
****Here I am on my knees****  
****Begging if you please**

He held her sweaty naked body, fingers trailing circles on her shoulders, and then on her round bump. He looked outside the huge window. Many things had changed, many things were different now, but the moon wasn't. It had always been the same moon, when half and when full.

Remus Lupin had always hated the moon. But Nymphadora Tonks had taught him to appreciate its beauty, at least when it was not full. What he loved about it was that it was always there, good or bad he didn't know, but it was always the same, and all he knew was that he needed some things to not change in his life, he needed some things to stay the same. He needed her to always be there, to never change. And in some strange, unbelievable way, he –_they-_ also needed the moon.

******And the night you don't come my way****  
****I'll pray and pray more each day****  
****Cause we love you, Mr. Moonlight****  
****Mr. Moonlight**


	16. White Christmas

**Just a fluffy little chapter before all the angst begins:) I hope you like it!**

**Thank you so much for your reviews, they really make me feel great!**

If anybody saw the room where Remus and Nymphadora Lupin lived, he wouldn't believe that there was a war going on. He would think of them as poor, that was true. The room was quite small for a couple expecting a baby, but it wasn't like Nymphadora had married Remus for his large fortune in first place. However, a creative wave had hit her last week, and she had applied all her talent on decorating a small Christmas tree. She had even bewitched the light bulbs to sing carols,but something had gone terribly wrong and they had ended up screaming like a bunch of hysterical banshees. Andromeda had finally managed to make them shut up with her wand. The decorations were so beautiful, and the room was looking so warm and charming. That's why nobody would think there was a war going on.

It was Christmas Eve. It was the third Christmas since Nymphadora had fell in love with Remus. Two years ago, they had shared their first kiss. She would never forget it. Last year she had spent Christmas Eve alone and in misery, having declined Molly Weasley and her parents' invitations. And now she was sitting in an armchair by the fire, her hand laid protectively on her baby bump. She was trying to read a book, a Dickens' favorite of Remus, but she couldn't concentrate. Last night had been full moon and he still hadn't returned home. She was starting to worry he wouldn't show up in time for dinner, when the room's door opened and he appeared there, wrapped in his old travelling cloak, with wet hair and eyelashes from the melting snow. A huge grin appeared on her face as she fell into his arms.

"Are you alright?" she asked, worried like every time this month. "What took you so long? Was it the werewolves?" Images of fights between huge hairy creatures filled her mind and she felt proud for her brave husband.

"Actually, I went shopping." He muttered hesitantly, trying to hide a grin.

"What?" She looked at him bewildered, as the werewolf fight images disappear from her head. "You went bloody shopping during a war, with all that snow? Where did you find the money and… open shops?"

"Whoever searches finds." He answered mysteriously. "I'm sorry if I worried you."

"It's not that. It's just… I wish you'd taken me with you!"

"It'd be far too dangerous, Dora. Besides, I went gift shopping!"

Her expression became even more cheerful, as she couldn't wait for morning to open her presents, which Remus had put under the tree in the dining room, next to the ones he had bought for Andromeda and Aunt Prudence.

"Good thing that bookshops and hosiery shops haven't banned werewolves yet. I wish I could say the same about St. Mungo's. I'd feel great if we were able to go there…"

"Why? Are you hurt by another werewolf?" her worried eyes examined his appearance.

"No, I'm fine. It's just that someone should check on you and the baby, see how it's developing."

"Don't worry." She smiled reassuringly. "Me and my son are in perfect health. The only problem is that he's really hungry. He's already smelt Aunt Prudence's turkey and granny Andromeda's roast potatoes, and he really can't wait. So I suggest we head to dinner, they'll be waiting for us!"

Christmas dinner cooked by Aunt Prudence and Andromeda, was delicious. It was a lovely, quiet meal, until of course Nymphadora started arguing with her mother because she hadn't let her to help in the kitchen, knowing they would be grieving a couple of broken plates afterwards. Then Andromeda burst into tears, remembering her husband from whom he had had no news for months. It was the first Christmas they were spending apart after many years, therefore it was only expected of her to be depressed. Nymphadora had never felt comfortable to express her feelings in front of her mother, and the situation was quite awkward for her, so she retired to her room after wishing Merry Christmas, leaving her husband to comfort Andromeda. Remus assured her that Ted was probably fine, and then went to find his wife. He entered the room, and saw her red eyes twinkling slightly under the light of the Christmas tree's bulbs. She had been crying too. It was only natural. Nymphadora had never spent Christmas without her father.

"I couldn't wait until tomorrow for you to open my presents." He grinned softly. A wide smile appeared on her face, when she saw him pulling two packages from under his jumper. "Here." He handed her the smaller one, which was neatly wrapped with newspaper, unlike the other which had shop's wrapping. With a small girl's impatience, she tore the newspaper apart, and her breath caught on her throat. Her trembling hands were holding a tiny silver pendant necklace, which had the shape of a swallow.

"I can't believe it!" she whispered. "It is the same with…"

"With the headclip I gave you on Christmas Eve two years ago, yes. I could have given you the whole set but I decided to keep this for our following Christmases."

"You knew there would be more Christmases?" she whispered with a lump on her throat.

He took her hands in his. "Listen, Dora. As you very well know I am stubborn, and that's why I kept pushing you away all this time. But apart from stubborn I am also really, really selfish. I needed you in my life, and a small, insane part of my brain never stopped wishing that we would have future together, even though I couldn't even admit it. I guess that subconsciously I needed to keep this necklace to remind myself that I had to give it to you in the future, so you could have the set."

She wished she could say so many things, but she was speechless. She just wore it around her neck and then fell in his arms. "You are unbelievable." She whispered.

"I just hope you like it."

"_Like it_? Well, let's say that the present I'll give you will totally _suck _compared to this! I feel so embarrassed now!"

She hesitantly handed him a packet, badly-wrapped with a colorful paper. He tore the paper apart, and found a navy blue mass of wool. It was a scarf, and it was quite asymmetric. "Dora," he asked slowly, "did you make it?"

She buried her face, which was now bright red to match her spiky festive hair, in her hands. "Yeah. Why? Is it that crappy? I tried, I really tried, and maybe mum can fix it…"

He grabbed her hands and pulled them from her face. "Dora," he said clearly, emphasizing on every word. "This scarf, is the most beautiful present I have ever got in my entire life."

"Really?" she asked carefully.

"I love it! But how… how did you make it? Do you know how to knit?"

"Molly gave me that knitting tutoring book on my birthday, _Your Wand, Your Needle Your Friend, _she probably hoped I'd become a decent housewife. I believe I have absolutely failed that part, but when it came to this scarf, I so badly wanted to make something for you myself!"

"I love it!" he pulled her into a slow, affectionate kiss. "I love you."

"I love your more." She smiled teasingly. "But what's in that package?"

She realized that he was keeping the last one on purpose. He simply gave it to her.

"What?" she asked disbelievingly. "A second gift?"

"Not exactly. Open it."

She tore the package it apart, and it was the signal for her heartbeat to fasten again. There, lying on her lap, was the tiniest piece of clothing she had ever beheld. A knitted pale mint green romper which wasn't much bigger than her two hands, with a white wolf embroidery on the front. She let tears fall freely on her cheeks. He pulled her into his arms again and stroked her hair. "I can't believe you're crying! What happened now, silly?" he muttered tenderly. She didn't give an answer, she just laughed and cried at the same time.

He waved his wand and the wireless started playing Potterwatch. They heard Muggle's Christmas classics from the 50s, probably in honor of Dumbledore and his affection for Muggles. He held her hand and got up. "Come on." He said softly. "We haven't danced in a while. I've missed the feeling of your quite delicate and careful feet _accidentally_ stepping on mine!"

She punched him teasingly. She got up and threw her arms around his shoulders, trying to think whether she had ever felt so blissful in her entire life. The cracking of the fireplace and the beautiful voice of Frank Sinatra was exactly what she would call Christmas spirit. The room was dark, only with the firelight and the bulbs from the tree. They were smiling and looking into each other's eyes, sharing the same feelings, as their feet moved clumsily, and the bump was between them. It was the only thing they didn't mind separating them. She laid her head on his shoulder, still smiling like a lunatic. He was smelling of books and chocolate.

"Merry Christmas, Remus." She whispered.

"Merry Christmas, Dora." They stopped dancing, and he held her hands. He slowly led her to bed. They sat on it, and she pulled his jumper off his shoulders. They didn't share a word as she unbuttoned his shirt and he slowly raised her green sweater to reveal the smooth skin of her round belly. "You're getting bigger and bigger every day." He said while caressing it.

"Look who's talking!" she teased. "With all the chocolate you've been eating lately, you'll soon become fatter than me in no time!"

"Are you sure we can do this? Is it… safe?"

She nodded. "It is. And you talk too much."

She lay back on the bed and he got on top of her, kissing longingly, their hot lips and tongues dancing passionately, sucking every second. His hands stroked the heated skin of her breasts and rested between them, feeling her heart beating frantically against it. She broke the kiss.

"Um, Remus?" she said in a quiet, seductive voice.

"Yes, darling?"

"I would really appreciate if you didn't crash me and my baby under the weight of your chocolate belly!"

She was looking for trouble, which translated to a tickle fight. They made love with the company of the firelight and Frank Sinatra's voice. It was snowing outside, but their bodies were warm, pressed to each other, and their hearts were even warmer. Nymphadora Lupin closed her eyes and rested on her head on her husband's chest, smiling, as he stroked their baby between them. Christmas Eve had been awesome. Bloody awesome, in fact.


	17. A Day in the Life

**I've always loved the idea of Potterwatch, and I wanted to write a chapter from the others' (not Harry's) POV, while they were making an episode. Believe me, this was one of the hardest chapters to write, it took me days to finally decide it, so I apologize if it isn't really good.**

**Please review, it will mean so much! **

**Thank you for being so awesome and supportive of me and my story all this time! I hope the following chapters won't disappoint you!**

**Song: A Day In The Life, The Beatles**

**I read the news today oh, boy****  
About a lucky man who made the grade****  
And though the news was rather sad****  
Well, I just had to laugh****  
I saw the photograph****  
He blew his mind out in a car****  
He didn't notice that the lights had changed****  
A crowd of people stood and stared****  
They'd seen his face before****  
Nobody was really sure if he was from the house of lords**

The magical equipment used to broadcast Potterwatch was easy to use and to move, which was useful, considering that the place was changed every time, due to safety reasons. Kingsley cleared his throat and pulled the microphone closer.

"We are present in the airwaves again, to keep you company and announce you the latest news. First of all, we have to talk for a heroic murder of a Death Eater from an ignorant Muggle! Rodent, will you say the story?"

"It's Rapier!"

"Right, Rapier."

"Good morning from me, fellow wizards! Here's what happened: Notorious Death Eater Diomedes Moore was coming out of a Muggle house which he had just set on fire. The owner of the house, who lived alone and fortunately lost nobody but his cat, was returning to his home, when he saw it in flames. His shock was so massive, that without even noticing, he ran over Diomedes Moore who was passing the street with his car and killed him. Moore had underestimated the power of Muggle technology, and thought the car wouldn't do his noble Pureblood butt any harm, but that's what happens when you think too highly of yourself."

"Don't forget to help Muggles in need." Kingsley took the microphone. "A simple spell can save more than one innocent lives."

"So what happened with the Muggle, Rodent? I believe he was sent in prison." Asked Lee Jordan.

"It's Rapier, River, and indeed he was. However Muggles seem to be on our side, and that's why we are on theirs too. That man would be sent in prison, but Patriarch, risking his life helped with a little Imperius curse to the Muggle authorities, and he was left alone. Of course, he's in trouble now that Death Eaters will search him for revenge, but he was taken under the protection of mine and of Holey's." Fred smiled proudly for his father's action.

George took the microphone from his twin brother.

"At first he was really shocked with getting to know about the magical world, of course he isn't allowed to go out of our shop, which he loves…"

"After all, everybody does!"

"Weasley Wizard Wheezes is the only remaining open shop at these times, ready to spread the laugh, so don't forget to pay a visit…"

"Shopping can always cheer you up, we have new supplies of You-Know-Poo, and it's on sale!"

"Only for a week!"

Remus pulled the microphone from Fred. "Thank you, Rodent, that was enough with the advertisement. Now, we have a suggestion for you all who listen. It is very kind and brave of you to support Harry Potter and our program by producing badges and t-shirts with moving pictures of the so-called _Undesirable, _but he is called like that for a reason, because _they _do not desire him. That's why we should ask you to stop and stay safe, as a witch named Vickie Collins, wearing such a badge was found murdered yesterday. Of course the _Wizarding Wireless –No News- Network _has ceased to report her death, and we believe her memory deserves a moment of silence."

**I saw a film today oh, boy****  
The English army had just won the war****  
A crowd of people turned away****  
But I just had to look****  
Having read the book****  
I'd love to turn you on.**

They all stopped talking and solemnly stared at the floor while keeping a moment of silence. Nymphadora felt a lump on her throat. Why would the woman do such a reckless thing? It was so sad…

Finally, Lee took the microphone. "Thank you Romulus, and thank you all for remembering Vickie Collins, and we hope you will support Harry Potter equally, though not in such reckless ways. We are in the pleasant position to inform you that this is the first time that other deaths haven't been noted since our last broadcast, and this makes us all very optimistic. Ted Tonks and Dean Thomas are believed to be alive, and their families would love to receive their news." His glance fell on Nymphadora. She nodded at Lee and, subconsciously, dug her nails into her skin. No news was good news for her father. Or wasn't it?

Kingsley took the microphone. "Thank you, River, and that's true. We should be optimistic and we should not lose our courage and faith to Harry Potter. However, like Mad-Eye would say, don't ever forget to be vigilant."

George grabbed the microphone. "That's right, King. And since today's episode is quite optimistic as we've all agreed, I believe it's time. Rapier, after you!"

"Today it is Romulus birthday, and we'd very much like to celebrate it here on Potterwatch! Happy Birthday Romulus!" At the same moment, Fred dragged a colorful trumpet out of his robes and played the Birthday song, as all the others in the room, even Kingsley, started singing _Happy Birthday to you _on air. Only George changed the lyrics, and sang out of tune _Happy Birthday to you, sometimes you turn hairy, that's true, but Rainbow doesn't care if you're a werewolf, and we all love you too! _They all laughed as Remus looked at them with wide open eyes. He had been extremely touched, as they had made his own birthday an issue on Potterwatch! Even he had almost forgotten it was his birthday, but they hadn't! His eyes met Tonks' loving ones. She smiled. Had she told them?

**Woke up, fell out of bed****  
Dragged a comb across my head****  
Found my way downstairs and drank a cup****  
And looking up, I noticed I was late****  
Found my coat and grabbed my hat****  
Made the bus in seconds flat****  
Found my way upstairs and had a smoke****  
And somebody spoke and I went into a dream****  
Ah**

Remus took the microphone. "Thank you very much everybody! I would tell you to never forget the small pleasures in life, like spending time with your friends or celebrate your birthday, however difficult that would be, but I would be hypocritical, as _I _had almost forgotten it was my birthday! But yes, how wrong would I be if I forgot to take pleasure in my everyday life, even during a war? You see, my wife, Rainbow, is expecting our child, wouldn't it be extremely sad if I lost those precious moments?"

"Aaaw", the twins teased, as Tonks took the microphone from her husband.

"Thank you, love, and Happy Birthday!" she smiled at him, while secretly holding his hand under the table. "It is truly beautiful, creating a life during a war, even though I feel like a fat cow and the baby's kicking the guts out of me, it makes me feel really hopeful!"

She handed the microphone to Fred. "You heard what Rainbow said, listeners, didn't you?"

"Of course you did!" said George.

"All you need is love, you already know that anyway, you smart people!"

"Actually, in conclusion, all you need is babies! Babies bring hope. That's why you should all make babies!"

"The process wouldn't hurt either!"

Kingsley literally grabbed the microphone from Fred. "Thank you, Rodient, that was enough! Next Password is McKinnon. Don't forget to tune in again, for more stories, update and advice! Keep safe, do what you can to stop You-Know-Who and support Harry Potter!"

"And make babies!"

**I read the news today oh, boy****  
Four thousand holes in Blackburn, Lancashire****  
And though the holes were rather small****  
They had to count them all****  
Now they know how many holes it takes to fill the Albert hall****  
I'd love to turn you on**


	18. Hey Jude, Don't Let me Down

**I really don't know about this chapter. It was extremely difficult for me to write about Ted's death, I wish I could skip it but it was an undoubtedly important part of the story. As for the second part of this chapter, it might seem very strange, even stupid, but I just had to write it! The idea came to me like a scene I **_**had**_** to watch in a movie, and I just had to use my all time favorite Beatles song, ****Hey Jude****, once more, even though I've already used it in my previous story.**

**In the end I'm also using ****Don't let me down.**

**I'd love to hear your opinion!**

**Thank you so much for all your reviews!**

Nymphadora Lupin tried to remember whether she had ever felt like this before. She tried to remember whether her heart had ever felt so torn, like in a million different pieces unable to ever get together again. She tried to remember whether her head hurt so much for her to even cry. She tried to remember whether something so precious had ever been taken away from her before. She had felt pain, every time that Remus had rejected her. But it wasn't the same. Those two kinds of pain were so similar, yet so different at the same time.

Nymphadora Tonks had experienced pain before, that was true. She had lost people extremely important for her. Sirius, Mad-Eye… And every time she wanted a shoulder to cry on, even in times when Remus hadn't been there for her, her parents would always open their door and their arms to let her in. The only problem now, was that her father wasn't there. The one she had lost this time, was him.

It was Remus who had found him, pale and lifeless. It was Remus who had to tell her and her mother. Remus, not Potterwatch. Remus, who had lost a father, even though he hadn't realized it before, even though he hadn't known Ted for more than a few months. It was Remus, who was feeling so broken, who believed no one deserved to be so heartbroken, let alone those two women, his wife and her mother.

After Andromeda had regained consciousness, she desired to be left alone. In vain they had struggled to unlock her room. She didn't wish to see anybody. She had lost her world, however she was a bright woman, who loved her daughter more than she loved herself. When she finally left her room, she didn't fall on Nymphadora's arms so they could cry together, as everyone had expected. Instead she managed to collect her pieces and start living again, so that she would be there for her pregnant daughter.

Nymphadora was wondering why she couldn't cry. Her body was numb, just like her mind. Remus had tried to get her to talk, but it was impossible. A sharp pain on her stomach after a couple of days, was what helped her to finally cry. He held her and stroked his hair, and she just cried like she hadn't done for months. They didn't talk. They didn't need to say anything.

Their relationship had always been unique, precious. She loved stepping on his feet and dancing. She loved hiding in the dog house and having him search for her. She loved grabbing the spoon from his hand and eating his ice cream. She loved looking out of the window at five o'clock in the morning. She always looked out of the window at five o'clock in the morning, and woke up her parents. Her mother didn't really appreciate being woken up, but he laughed, even though he had to wake up early for work. He loved holding the tiny baby in his arms, watching her change her hair. He loved squeezing the crazy teenager in his arms and having her screaming to let her go. He loved dressing up like Santa Claus and let her sneak out of her room in order to take a peek. He loved grabbing the spoon from her little hand and eating her ice cream. He loved watching her pregnant. He didn't like watching her pregnant and unhappy, but that was what life was like. Her daddy loved Dora, and Dora loved her daddy, but they weren't destined to spend more time together. He wouldn't see his grandchild, he wouldn't see his daughter pregnant and happy, or a mother and happy, he wouldn't see his beloved wife a grandmother. And there were so many things she'd like to tell him…

Why would anyone kill him? Why wouldn't they let him be? He had never harmed a fly, he was a magnificent, optimist, a great wizard. It was unfair. She knew that sounded childish, but it was all she could say. It was so damn unfair.

They disliked happiness, they disliked peace, they hated love. They were twisted, evil, and she was sorry for them. They hated the human race, just like any simple Muggle racist did. They always thought they were superior to Muggles, but they were much worse. She wished she could kill them all, but then, who was she? A murderer?

Instead, she decided to survive for her child, for Remus and for her mother. She had to be there for them. She promised to herself that she would never let anything happen to them. That would be her. That would be enough.

8*8*8*8*8

The Werewolf raised his head at the moon and howled, a sound which would make the blood of anyone who would hear it freeze. The Werewolf was really hungry and tired, almost sick. The transformation had been really harsh, something which had not happened for years, and he had already done enough harm to himself for a night. He felt like a monster. Werewolves can't think like people when they are transformed, but this particular werewolf could feel disgusted with himself, even though he didn't quite realize what his sentiments translated to. The Werewolf had no strength to run and hunt his food. He just stayed there, into the darkness, in the middle of a forest, howling to the moon.

What the Werewolf hadn't considered, was the possibility to find company. Werewolves can't recognize people, but they can very well recognize other werewolves, and he would never forget the smell of the monster who had cursed him for life.

Fenrir Greyback was a considerably strong and scary creature, with his bushy grey hair and huge bloodstained fangs. Werewolves didn't make friends with people, and they most certainly didn't make friends with others of their kind. Especially when it came to two already fatal enemies, their meeting wouldn't possibly be considered as pleasant.

The Werewolf bared his teeth and growled faintly, trying to make the other monster leave. It was only expected that his attempt to get rid of it, would be in vain. Fenrir also bared his sharp teeth, in what resembled a teasing smile, and growled with much more strength. The Werewolf slowly backed away. He could sense that a fight was coming, and it was the last thing that he needed. He had already lost blood, and his energy was almost gone. But little did Fenrir care. Before the Werewolf could even manage to protect himself, he was attacked and forced to the ground, with two enormous paws pressed on his chest. He moaned and tried to set himself free, but with little success. He felt a painful scratch on his ribs, and moaned again, as Fenrir's disgusting saliva ended up on his face. However, the Werewolf had always been a good fighter, even when tired. After struggling a little more, he managed to jump up, surprising Fenrir, and to press his teeth in his shoulder. Fenrir growled in pain. He was furious, his eyes were rolling insanely. He stood on his two feet, and raised his enormous body over the Werewolf, howling angrily to the moon. It was a particularly terrifying sight. And then, the two werewolves were fighting, body with body, rolling on the ground, scratching and biting, letting heart-stopping roars and moans.

It wasn't difficult to guess who would win. Fenrir had once promised to himself that he would kill Remus Lupin, and he was more than willing to keep his promise. He was taking major pleasure to do that especially when they were both in their werewolf forms, so that he would feel far more superior, far stronger, far more _animal. _He had never been really good with magic, anyway.

The Werewolf lay on the ground, blood running from his head and ribs, unable to move or to defend himself. The Werewolf was ready to die, everything would be better than the pain. He just needed this to stop. He couldn't breathe. Werewolves didn't mind tasting blood, on the contrary, they loved eating other animals, they loved blood and flesh. But the Werewolf knew that it was _his _blood he tasted now. He just wished it would stop. He just wished that a final bite from Fenrir would kill him, release him from this. He could see the blurry figure of the monster leaning over him, ready to finish him, and suddenly, the image of a big black dog appeared in his head. The Dog waved its tail and opened its mouth, showing its teeth. Would it bite him too? The Werewolf begged that the dog would kill him.

But it didn't. Instead, the Dog spoke in a language that the Werewolf could understand. It was the first time that the Werewolf could think that way, that he could hear voices in his head.

"Hey Moony, what do you think you're doing, mate?"

**Hey Jude don't make it bad****  
****Take a sad song and make it better****  
****Remember to let her into your heart****  
****Then you can start to make it better**

The Werewolf didn't feel angry at the Dog which had appeared in his head. Actually, he felt better with its company. He was glad that the Dog would be there while he died. He wouldn't die alone. He closed his eyes. Everything that used to ache until then went calm. Was that what dying was like?

The Dog, however, didn't have the intention to let him die peacefully. Instead, it kept talking. "Moony! Can you listen to me? You're not ready to die, buddy!"

Why? Why couldn't he die? He could go with the Dog, they would run in the forest and play, chase their tails or hunt rats.

"Bloody hell! Why are you so stubborn? You can't die yet! You can't leave her alone!"

Her? Who would he leave alone?

"My little cousin, you soddin' idiot! She's expecting your first child, in case you haven't noticed! She loves you and she waits for you, you have to go to her! You can't leave her alone!"

The Dog's cousin? A child?

**Hey Jude don't be afraid****  
****You were made to go out and get her****  
****The minute you let her under your skin****  
****Then you begin to make it better**

And then, the Dog was not alone. It was escorted by a Deer and a Doe. "Remus Moony Lupin!" The Doe scolded him, "I would never expect such an attitude from you! Your wife's waiting for you, and you know that she's the most important thing you have in your life, but you still think you can just go and _die_? Completely irresponsible!"

The deer stepped forward. "Come on, Moony, get up! You will make it! You _have _to make it! For her, for your child!"

And before he could think of what he saw, the images of the Dog, the Deer and the Doe, took the form of them. It was James, Lily and Sirius, talking to him.

"It will be fine, mate", muttered Sirius soothingly, "we're watching after you. You've always been strong, brave. You have to be now too. You've been through a lot, but don't worry anymore. You have her. You have found her, now go and get her."

And with that, they disappeared, leaving him alone.

**And any time you feel the pain, Hey Jude, refrain****  
****Don't carry the world upon your shoulders****  
****For well you know that it's a fool who plays it cool****  
****By making his world a little colder****  
****Da da da da da****  
****da da da da**

He opened his eyes, as the sun started rising, and his form started resembling that of a human. A cough shook his body and he spat blood, and then it came to him: Dora! Her lavender eyes, her silk touch, her comforting smile, the child she was carrying… How could he leave them alone!

**Don't let me down, don't let me down.****  
****Don't let me down, don't let me down.**

How could he even think of letting them down!

He could sense Fenrir's face closer to his, he could smell his deathly breath. He closed his eyes, waiting stoically, when a bright light blinded them both. Remus Lupin managed to notice the silvery form of himself, of the Werewolf. Fenrir ran away, terrified. He was safe. All he had to do was find her. But she seemed to be already there. He could smell her gardenia scent. Was it possible? Was he still delirious?

**Nobody ever loved me like she does,****  
****Ooh she does, yeah she does.****  
****And if somebody loved me like she does,****  
****Ooh she does, yeah she does.**

He probably was. Was it possible that he was staring into her lavender eyes, there, in the middle of the forest?

"I'd easily kill him, you know, if I didn't have to stay and help you get home first! You were right though, when you'd told me that that monster, Greyback, was such a chicken when it came to magic? Did you see how he ran away when he saw my Patronus? I knew I had to come and find you tonight, I'd felt that something was wrong." he felt her warm touch on his face. "I can't believe it! Look what that asshole did to you! You've lost blood, we'll apparate home together. Sure mum knows some really good healing spells; I hope you're not concussed though! Can you hear me, love?"

He managed to open his eyes. His head hurt. She was leaning over him, with tears in her face, her wand in her hand, and her nightgown stretching over her huge bump. "I'm fine." He managed to croak. "Never been better!"

She sighed, stopping the bleeding on his head with her wand. "Thank God!"she laughed.

Padfoot, Prongs and Lily had been right. He couldn't possibly die. She was beautiful.

"Did you think ever I'd let you down?"

**Don't let me down, don't let me down.****  
****Don't let me down, don't let me down.**


	19. Of Cows, Chocolate and Pinafores

**I couldn't help thinking of a hormonal Tonks driving Remus crazy. It's just so funny… it's just so them!**

**I hope you like this chapter:) Thank you very much for your reviews!**

"You know how sensitive your dad is when it comes to his chocolate supplies. He'd better not catch us having some… Anyway, I don't think he'll get angry, little baby, it is for a good cause after all! It's not me who needs the chocolate, it's you!"

Remus entered Aunt Prudence's kitchen, trying to hide a smile. Nymphadora had pink hair again, and was literally hidden into the cupboard, which was considerably difficult, what with her huge bump, which was an obstacle for her every time she decided to pass through a door. She was wearing her bright red pajamas with the little cows on them, and her guilty expression while she stole her husband's chocolate was particularly amusing. When she saw him, she jumped up, hitting her head on the cupboard door.

He quickly rushed to her. "Are you alright?"

"You scared me! What are you doing in the kitchen?"

"I should ask, what are you doing in my chocolate cupboard?"

"It wasn't my fault! Your son asked for chocolate! He takes that after you, I suppose!" she said in defense.

"Oh, so it was my son you were talking to, and not yourself?" he asked, amused.

"Yes, I like discussing things with my unborn child, if that's alright with you!" she put her hands protectively over her bump.

"My son can have as much chocolate as he pleases, then, you have my permission." He chuckled, while she triumphantly took a bar of chocolate from the cupboard. "Should we be getting to our room?"

She agreed. He helped her climb the stairs while she moaned about her legs and back aching.

"Come on, let's get up there and I'll see what I can do to help you!"

They entered the room and she sat on the rocking chair.

"I like your pajamas." He smiled.

"I know, they're cute." She said rather grumpily, and then eyed him suspiciously. "What do you mean you like them? What's that smile? Do you mean I'm like those cows on my pajamas? Am I a cow, Remus? Am I that fat?" she looked on the verge of tears.

He kneeled on the floor beside her and hugged her knees. "What are you talking about, my love? I've never said such a thing!"

"Yes, but you've thought about it! Come on, Remus, you don't have to hide, we all know that I've become a huge fat cow!" and with that, she burst into tears.

He felt totally helpless. He had been used to those hormonal fits. He got up, and pulled her into his arms, stroking her hair. "You look beautiful, love, truly stunning! You had always been one of the thinnest women I knew, and you still haven't gained much weight, you're just carrying our baby! And it really suits you; in fact, I can't take my eyes off of you!"

She sobbed in his arms, and punched him in the arm softly. "Yeah, I know, I'm so sexy and elegant, what with sweating all day, having a gigantic arse and having my bladder pressed…"

He gulped. "That's already enough information, darling."

"Also, you've been snoring during the whole night, not letting me sleep at all. Now I might die of tiredness."

His eyes opened widely. "I haven't been _snoring_!"

"Oh, of course you have!"

"But I don't… I don't snore." He sounded hurt.

"You do. I should have heard what Sirius told me about your snoring that night."

"Dora, Sirius was drunk almost _every _night. He didn't know what he was saying."

"He did. Anyway, you snore, and that's what matters."

He sighed. "What about a backrub?" he asked. "Would that make you forgive me?"

She giggled. "Yeah, I guess it would."

He gave her his hand and helped her get up and lie on her side on the bed. He unbuttoned and lowered the top of her pajamas, and his hands started rubbing gently, relieving her sore muscles. She smiled and hugged her pillow. That was bliss, pure bliss. She couldn't have wished for better. Remus was the kindest, sweetest man. Suddenly, she gasped.

"What is it?" he asked alarmed.

"Your son, he finds delight in kicking his poor mother!" she laughed.

He didn't know how to react. "That's not very nice of you, young man, though I'm convinced you'll turn out to be a girl."

"Alright, but if it'll be a girl we'll name her Pinky, you had promised." She said sweetly.

"Technically, Death-Eaters attacked us while we were discussing this, so I didn't stand a chance to promise. Anyway, what did you say that Pinky stands for? Was it pinafore, if I can recall properly? Or is it your small finger?"

"It's after my favorite color." She snorted. "Anyway, do you want to see?"

"Do I want to see your Pinky?" he took her little finger to his lips and kissed it softly. "Here it is, I'm already acquainted with him!"

"No, I meant, do you want to see how he's kicking?"

A smile appeared on his face. "Oh, yes. I do."

She reached for his hand and pulled it around her, then placed it on her bump. His heart raced as he felt the movement underneath. It was his child, _their _child. How could he ever leave them? They had made a miracle, they were creating life and it was crazy. It was unbelievable.

"So?" she asked. "Did you notice?"

"I did." He breathed. "It's wonderful."

He stayed there, his arm around his bump, feeling the baby kicking, placing kisses on her bare shoulders.

"You've probably never heard that before," he said suddenly, "but you know, I love you, just a little bit!"

She smiled. "Do you love him too?"

"I love him. Very, very much. And I can't wait to see him."

"Are you scared?"

He thought for a while. "Yes. I'm scared."

"I am too. What if we don't become good parents?"

"Why wouldn't we?"

"Because I'm clumsy. And you're stubborn. We're both stubborn."

"My stubbornness was pure stupidity. Your stubbornness was loyalty. I don't think I'll mind if our child becomes loyal." He pressed his lips on her shoulder once again. "As for your clumsiness, I'm afraid I can promise anything. If our child survives what with you dropping it on the floor, then we'll probably have to hide all the sharp objects from the room, not to mention that we can never let it on a toy broomstick!"

"We have to care about its nutrition too. We don't want our baby to adopt a chocolate based diet, do we? That would be entirely your fault."

"Really? Is my diet bad? I believe that I'm talking to a woman with Black blood in her veins, that means you like eating like a pig far more than I do!"

"Oh, is that so? Now I'm a pig, is that what I am?"

"No, darling, you misunderstood…"

"Yes, tell me that I'm huge! It won't hurt me at all! First you say that I'm a fat pig and then _I misunderstood!"_

"Nymphadora…"

"Watch your mouth, Lupin! Because I may sit on you!"


	20. Teddy Remus Lupin

**Thank you so much for your reviews! I really hope you'll like this chapter!**

"Remus…"

"…"

"Remus!"

"Mhmm…"

"Wake up!"

"Five more minutes, James! I don't want to go to Potions class!"

"Remus _bloody _Lupin! Wake up and move your fat arse instantly!"

Remus Lupin jumped in the air, throwing the blanket on the floor. "What happened? Is it Death Eaters?"

"The baby is coming!"

Remus Lupin's face became pale as a sheet. His wife was covered in sweat and she looked in terrible pain. Her hair had a dirty shade of blond. "The… the baby? But I'm not ready yet! Can't you make it stop?"

Nymphadora Lupin glared at him. "Listen here, Remus Lupin, because I believe you have misunderstood something: _I _would really love to make it stop, concerning that my belly feels like it's being stepped on by a giant troll, and that I'll have to push that stubborn child of yours out of a particularly small hole, but that baby won't stop and wait because I say so, let alone because _you _do! So kindly remove yourself from your comfortable bed so you can help me in my attempts to give birth to Mini Moony Lupin before I die in pain or before he grows fangs and decides to rip my womb and get out triumphantly, like a true bloody Marauder!"

Remus had been staring at her terrified, all the blood strained from his face, unable to move or react. His child was on the way and his wife was in pain, and he didn't have the faintest idea of what to do. When he regained control, he immediately sent a Patronus to Molly, and he ran outside to yell for Andromeda and Aunt Prudence's help. Then, he helped Nymphadora to their bed and sat beside her. Her eyes were shut and she was panting. He finally managed to gain control, when Andromeda and Aunt Prudence burst into the room to prepare it. He threw his arms around her and asked awkwardly: "Are you alright?"

"I'm so bloody alright I might as well die!" she groaned.

He shivered. "Don't say such things, my love! Our baby is coming, and you will do great, you'll be holding it before you know it! Molly's on her way, she has dealt with seven pregnancies!"

"And it's not like I don't know a thing!" said Andromeda soothingly. They heard a knock on the door. Old Aunt Prudence rushed downstairs and returned with a flushed smiling Molly Weasley. She gave a hug to Remus. "Thank you so much for coming!" he whispered. The older woman turned to Nymphadora. "I believe you are ready, Tonks dear! You must start pushing! Oh, I can't believe you two are having a little one!"

"Do you… do you want me to stay?" asked Remus.

His wife's hair turned bright red, as she threw a pillow straight to his head. "Don't talk to me, Remus Lupin, I'm almost dying in pain here, and it's all your fault!"

He didn't need more. Remus Lupin was a brave man, he didn't mind fighting with Death-Eaters and bloodthirsty werewolves, but dealing with a furious wife while she was giving birth, in a room with three other women, that he was much more afraid of. He walked out of the room, his heart pounding frantically in his chest. He was going to become a father! He had managed to realize this fact during the past nine months, but now, at that very moment, his beloved Dora was screaming behind the closed door, giving birth to their child, and all he could do was shake violently. He had never been excited, yet more scared in his whole life. _A father. _That thought was the most overwhelming, but still, he was extremely worried and guilty for poor Dora, being in such pain. He wished he could do something, anything, but his mind and body wouldn't cooperate. He just walked up and down in the corridor outside their room, biting his nails, a habit which characterized her, not him. _There's always a first time for everything. _And then, after what seemed like an eternity, he heard a cry. Then, the door opened and Molly Weasley got out of the room. She was covered in sweat, and her red curly hair was frizzy, sticking to all different directions, but a huge smile had lightened up her tired, thinner than usual, face. She pulled Remus to a motherly hug. "Congratulations, Remus!" she whispered. "You have a beautiful, healthy baby boy! He could swear that his heart stopped for a while there, after all, his brain needed to use all the energy, as it didn't stop saying _a boy, a boy, you have a son, Dora was right, _until he could finally realize it was true. Remus Lupin was a father. He grabbed Molly's hands. "I don't know how to thank you! Can I see him?"

"Of course, dear!" she laughed. "He's yours, after all! I have to go now, Arthur will be worried. You should really go to Shell Cottage, tell Bill and the others! They will be so glad!"

Just on time, Aunt Prudence got out of the room, holding a small bundle in her arms. "Well done, John!" she said approvingly. "He's a true Lupin! He has your eyes!" and then, she carefully handed it to him. At first, he was truly terrified. He didn't know how to hold the baby, it was too fragile, too tiny, but then everything came to its place. He remembered holding a baby Harry Potter like that, how quickly time passed… And now, the baby he was holding was his very own son. The moment he laid his eyes upon him, it was love at first sight. His heart melt. He wondered how a man can feel so much love. The baby's face was the most wonderful, innocent and serene sight he had ever seen. The warmth of its tiny body in Remus' arms, was certainly the best feeling in the world. There was only one odd: it was a redhead. Neither he, nor Nymphadora had natural red hair. He thought of calling Molly again, that child was definitely a Weasley. But then, its blurry eyes opened and looked at him. They were chocolate brown, like his own. He was a Lupin, indeed.

"Hello baby," he muttered, smiling. "We've been waiting for you!"

The door opened. Andromeda got out of the room. "Congratulations He's beautiful!" She smiled. He hadn't seen her smiling since Ted died. The baby started crying, and Remus stared at it in horror. Was he doing something wrong? Andromeda just laughed. "You should get him inside, he must eat."

He nodded, wondering how the baby would eat, as it had no teeth. Then, he laughed with his own stupidness. He would definitely make one silly dad! He opened the door and peered inside, still holding his son in his arms. Nymphadora was lying on their bed, looking sweaty and exhausted, yet blissful and gorgeous. He sat on her bedside, and gave her their son. A faint smile appeared on her face, which was covered by dark blond hair. "I'm so afraid that I'll drop him! He's so fragile! Women clumsy as me shouldn't be allowed to become mothers." He turned to look at her husband. "I'm a mother, Remus!" she muttered. "And you're a father! Can you believe it? We made a son!"

Remus looked at the two people he loved more than anything, as she bared her breast and he immediately started sucking hungrily. They were making the most stunning sight. "I know, my love. And he's perfect! Look at him!"

They both did so, and just when they did, they would not believe their eyes! His hair had turned dark blond, the same shade as his mother's.

"Is he…" she breathed.

"As a matter of fact, he seems to be!" Their son was a metamorphmagus!

"He most certainly isn't a werewolf, and look, apart from your eyes he also has your appetite!"

"I have such appetite only when it comes to chocolate. We should better say _your _appetite! You always used to eat like Sirius! Ran in your family!"

"Do you think he'd be happy for us?"

"He _is _happy for us, in fact he, Lily and James have opened a bottle of pixie-champagne up there, to celebrate how Moony finally managed to find a woman, and have a hair-changing were-cub with her! They'll eventually end up getting drunk, and Lily'll lecture them."

The baby finished eating, and she held it on her shoulder. "I feel so tired." She whispered. "I desperately want to sleep, but I can't close my eyes, it's like I want to look at him forever!"

"You two should both sleep, love. Don't worry, Teddy'll be fine, your mother will take him. While you sleep, I can go to the Shell Cottage."

She stared at him, starstruck. "What?"

"You know, love, to tell Bill and the others the news. Harry would make a perfect godfather, wouldn't he?"

"Sure, I'd love him to be the godfather, but what did you say, before the Shell Cottage part?"

"That he will be fine."

"How… how did you call him?"

"I called him Teddy. If you don't mind, I believe it would be only right to call him Ted!"

She remained speechless, until a smile and a tear appeared on her face at the same time. Her hand slowly reached for Remus'. "Teddy Remus Lupin." She whispered.


	21. Goodnight

**This little scene is nothing important, just what I wrote while listening to one of the most beautiful lullabies in the world, Goodnight by The Beatles.**

The little baby cried with all the strength of its tiny lungs. Nymphadora Lupin slowly opened one eye.

"Remus?"

"Mhmm…"

"Remus your son is trying to wake the whole neighborhood up."

"Mhmm…"

"It's your turn."

He opened his eyes and rubbed them. "Right, my turn." He muttered and got up from his comfortable bed, his body still aching from a hard full moon. Teddy was in his crib, stretching out his little arms and legs, screaming mercilessly. Remus held him and got back to his bed, where he sat, rocking the baby gently. "Do you think he wants to eat?" he whispered to Nymphadora.

"Again? He can't! He'll get sick! Not to mention my poor breasts which will probably melt, or something! He just needs to get back to sleep."

Remus sighed, as he stroked Teddy's blond head. "Don't you think that's enough, buddy? Your poor mommy and daddy both need some sleep!" He heard Nymphadora yawning on his side.

He pulled the blanket over his head, and continued rocking Teddy who was still crying, but less than before. Remus took a deep breath, and started singing quietly.

**Now it's time to say good night****  
****Good night Sleep tight****  
****Now the sun turns out his light****  
****Good night Sleep tight****  
****Dream sweet dreams for me****  
****Dream sweet dreams for you.****  
**

Teddy had stopped crying, and was now staring at his father with interested, wide open eyes. Remus could never stop thinking that his son was definitely a miracle. His little fingers were wrapped around his thumb, and his wonderful soft lips were parted, as he breathed peacefully. Nymphadora snuggled on his side, resting her arm protectively over him and Teddy. "That's beautiful, Remus! He loves it!" she mumbled. "Don't stop, please." He just smiled and continued the lullaby.

******Close your eyes and I'll close mine****  
****Good night Sleep tight****  
****Now the moon begins to shine****  
****Good night Sleep tight****  
****Dream sweet dreams for me****  
****Dream sweet dreams for you.**

Teddy's eyes closed, and he loosened his grip on Remus' thumb. After a few minutes, he was asleep in his arms. Remus' eyes moved from Teddy to Nymphadora. She had fallen asleep too, with a slight smile on her face, her arm still around him and their son. The moonlight was entering through the window, adding silver highlights on her pale pink hair which was surrounding her face. Nymphadora and Teddy were both beautiful. For once again the past days, Remus found himself wondering how a man could find so much love, for he was sure that no other man had ever loved more than he did his family. He'd never know how to thank Nymphadora for being so stubborn, for entering his life, and for finally giving him a son.

He would always protect them, and he would fight to give them a better world to live in. Remus Lupin would sacrifice everything for them. Because _they _were everything.

******Close your eyes and I'll close mine****  
****Good night Sleep tight****  
****Now the sun turns out his light****  
****Good night Sleep tight****  
****Dream sweet dreams for me****  
****Dream sweet dreams for you.****  
**

He carefully placed Teddy between them, and stroked Dora's hair. The moon was entering their window, but he wasn't afraid of it anymore. The moon was there to lighten their lives every night, and lighten it did.

Remus Lupin smiled, as his head touched the pillow. "Good night." He whispered to his family.

******Good night Good night Everybody****  
****Everybody everywhere****  
****Good night.**


	22. Confessions of a metamorphmagus Lupin

**I know that this is… insane. Utterly and completely. Probably ridiculous too. But I love Teddy. So much. And I wanted to write his POV. So here it is.**

**Please review! I love constructive criticism!**

_I love Her. I really do. She always smells of safety and food. I like food. Food is the best thing in life. Not that there are other things in life, not many at least, are there? I enjoy crying, it's quite fascinating in the beginning, listening to myself, I believe I have a pretty charming voice and my crying sounds cool. But when they don't understand what I want it becomes frustrating. All I want sometimes is attention, or to tell them that I've wetted myself, but She always insists on giving me The Breast. Not that it's bad. I like The Breast. It's soft and safe, and it smells of Her, and it has food, and like I previously told you, food is awesome. But I've come to the conclusion that She does that to get away from changing my nappy. Seriously, I could swear that She doesn't like it. That's weird, because I find it really fun having my nappy changed! I feel free and I wave my feet in the air, and there was a day when I did… my thing on the changing table, but then again, maybe that's why She doesn't like changing me. It's because She's jealous: I have a changing table all of my own and She hasn't. _

_Most of the times it's Him that changes my nappy. I really like Him too. I might as well love Him. Sometimes I wake up at night and everything is dark and scary and I cry so hard, because I'm afraid and alone, and I think that nobody loves me or cares for me and maybe I'm adopted, and that's quite sad, if you want my opinion. But every time that happens He comes and takes me in his arms and hands me to The Breast, or even better, sometimes, we walk together. I mean, He holds me and walks, and it's steady and nice, not as bumpy as it is when She walks with me in her arms, not to mention that he's tall and the world is quite panoramic from up there! Sometimes he wears a thing which I don't like, it's scratchy and irritates my face, but some other times he wears soft wooly things which smell like I do after they bathe me, which I don't like, the bath I mean, because water gets in my eyes and I cry, but the smell I like. And He talks a lot. His voice is reassuring but talking is stupid, that's what I think. I can't understand a word they're saying. Why would people talk when they could just cry? Everything would be easier that way. _

_Then again, I don't mind crying, but when big people cry it's not that pretty. The other She was holding me, not the one with the Breast, but the one who has long hair which I grab and smells differently, it's a serious and powerful smell, not really natural. I like Her too, despite her perfume. But not when she's crying. As I was telling you, she was holding me, and she started crying. She does that often, crying, I mean. And then I got scared and started crying too, and it was no fun at all. But She Who Owns The Breast, -She Who I Love The Most, I mean- grabbed me and sang to me, and even though it was a bumpy ride, as always, and her voice was worse than mine when I'm crying with all my talent, it was better there._

_And there's the other, who is older and smells of powder, and her nose scares me but that's ok, because I like Her too. She finds pleasure in scolding Him. Sometimes I feel sorry for Him. He lives in a house with all those women, and women are weird. But it's alright, dear Mister With the Nice Wooly Jumpers, I'm here for You, and I am a man as well! We have our man-to-man conversations and that makes Him feel better. As I told you, He talks a lot, and I answer to Him with other sounds. Even though He's the most serious, sometimes even He becomes silly and He does all those faces and sounds like the women do around me, but that's alright. Smart young people don't me don't mind when Big people act in such strange way. After all, they're funny sometimes! _

"Are you feeding him again?" Remus Lupin opened his eyes and looked at his wife, sleepily. She had bared her breast and was holding her turquoise haired son, but he was still crying.

"I'm trying to!" Nymphadora said desperately. "He doesn't seem to want any! I don't know how to stop him!"

Remus Lupin sat up on his bed. "That's not wise, young man, one shouldn't say no to breasts, especially when they belong to such a beautiful woman!"

She opened her eyes widely. "What are you saying, Lupin? This is your son you're talking to!"

"Bad attempt to be humorous." He apologized. "After all, it's three in the morning, I can't really concentrate. Not that he understands a word, anyway!"

"Maybe he does! Babies have instinct, you know! Don't you remember yesterday when mom was holding him and she suddenly thought about dad and started crying, and he got scared?"

"That's true, Teddy is a clever baby, aren't you, mister? Anyway, have you checked his nappy?"

"No!" she groaned. "Not again!"

He smiled and took the baby from her arms. It was true, he needed to be changed. He carried him to the changing table and waved his wand to do what was needed. "Sometimes I think you don't really fancy changing your own son!" he teased.

"How can you even think that?" she sounded offended. Remus took the baby back to their bed and placed it between them. It was now quiet but awake, looking at them with wide open eyes. She stroked his cheek with her thumb. "He'll hear you and he's going to hate me!"

Remus placed a kiss on her forehead. "How can he hate you?" he asked softly.

"Why? Many kids hate their parents, or are ashamed of them!"

"Do you plan to make your child feel ashamed of you?" he asked jokingly.

"I don't plan to call him Nymphadora, if that's what you're asking!"

"Darling, it would be quite wrong of you to call our son Nymphadora, even if it's such a lovely name."

She punched his shoulder. "Then if it doesn't have to do with a ridiculous name, why would he be ashamed of us?"

"If we were really old fashioned, maybe."

"That goes for you, without saying!"

"Do you mind me being old fashioned?"

She pulled his face closer and kissed him on the lips. "Not at all, Professor Lupin, I love your sense of fashion, especially your tweed blazer, even though I think Teddy despises it."

He looked hurt. "But it's vintage! Why would he?"

"I think it scratches his face when you're holding him."

They both stared at the little baby's face. Soft cheeks, small lips, beautiful chocolate brown eyes, blue hair, tiny fingers and toes, chubby legs and belly, and the sweetest scent on earth. How could a baby ever be more perfect? He was gorgeous. Nymphadora caressed his little hand with her thumb, and his fingers immediately were wrapped around it. It had been their favorite game the last month. She and Remus smiled. "Who is mommy's smart boy?" she cooed and turned to Remus. "Do you think he can understand what is going on around him?"

"I'm sure he can! And just because you asked before, I'm sure that he loves you. So very much."

"I'm sure he loves you too!" Nymphadora tried to hide a smile. "Not your tweed blazer though…"

"Dora…"

"What? It's scratchy!"


	23. The end of the beginning

**The beginning of the end…**

**Or not?**

**You honestly don't know how happy a review will make me during these hard days of my senior year life…**

"I said I'll come with you!" she screamed and followed her husband to the door of the house. Aunt Prudence was standing in the living room, with her wand on one hand, as the other was covering her mouth in horror, witnessing the couple's drama before her eyes. Andromeda Tonks was holding a crying Teddy in her arms, and was staring at them with her black eyes wide open, and huge dark circles under them.

"You're not going anywhere." He shouted and turned to Andromeda for help. She was more than willing too. "Remus is right. _I'm _not letting you go anywhere!"

"Oh, _really_?" spat Nymphadora. "Stop me if you can!"

Tears started rolling on Andromeda's cheeks. "I'm an auror, Remus, a fuckin' auror!" her daughter shouted. "I have the right to make my own decisions."

"No, you _don't have_ that right!" he said, and everybody froze. "You don't have that fuckin' right because you are a mother, you have a _son, _in case you have forgotten!"

The three women in the room were staring at the usually quiet Remus Lupin with huge, astonished eyes. He took a deep breath and looked at his wife apologetically. "Please, be sane. Stay here with Teddy. I'll be back before you know it." He walked to Andromeda who was holding his son, and placed a kiss on his red, tiny, crying face. Then, he grabbed Nymphadora in his arms and kissed her, before he slammed the door behind him.

Andromeda looked ready to faint, so Aunt Prudence walked to her, and grabbed the baby.

Nymphadora was still standing in the middle of the room, so shocked that she had forgotten to cry. He had left. He had gone to fight, and left her behind, he didn't let her go with him, he didn't let her go and defend _her _rights, _her _beliefs, _her _family, he didn't let her go and defend himself.

How could he?

What did he think she was? An unskilled housewife? She was more than certain that Molly Weasley was at Hogwarts at the moment, fighting some Death Eaters' butts off. What did he expect her to do? Stay back, worrying for her husband's life, rocking her baby and singing lullabies? She was an _auror, _for fuck's sake.

But then, she turned and faced her mother's ghost-pale face, and poor old Auntie Prudence, and little Teddy in her arms. How could she leave him? She couldn't. Not in a million years. She gently took the baby from the old lady's arms and rocked him softly, she placed soft kisses on his tiny forehead, she caressed his sweaty blue hair, she hummed a lullaby. Eventually, the baby stopped crying.

"That's a good boy, Teddy. Don't worry, Teddy, mommy isn't going anywhere. Mommy isn't leaving you."

The two older women felt relieved that Nymphadora didn't look like leaving, and finally abandoned the room, leaving her alone with her son.

Teddy drifted to sleep, and Nymphadora placed him to his crib, feeling completely numb. It was impossible to stay away from fighting when her husband was out there, risking his life. The thought made her knees bend and her heartbeat fasten. She couldn't lose him, she _couldn't. _Teddy couldn't. She had to go. When she became an Auror, when she became a member of the Order, she knew what she was signing up for, she knew that it was possible that she would die fighting. She'd never minded sacrificing her life for her beliefs.

But that was before she became a mother.

That had changed everything. Teddy needed her. Teddy was helpless, Teddy was tiny, Teddy needed his mother and father.

Nymphadora Lupin's heart was ready to explode out of her chest. She _would _go at Hogwarts, she _would _go to fight.

But before that, she had to make a quick stop at Grimmauld Place no. 12.


	24. Let it be

**I really don't know how to thank you for following me till here. I owe you all a huge apology for not being able to read and review all your new chapters, but I promise to catch up in the Christmas holidays, I honestly don't even have time to sleep…**

**Well, all I have to say for what you'll read is… this isn't the last chapter!**

Remus Lupin had never realized his body contained so much adrenaline. He was leading a group of fighters to the grounds, managing not to get hit by the curses that flew around him. They were stopped by a dozen of Death Eaters who had their wands raised, sending lightnings everywhere. He looked around. He couldn't see many people he knew. Only Fred and a few other old students, the rest of them were strangers, and younger students he had never met.

**When I find myself in times of trouble, Mother Mary comes to me****  
****Speaking words of wisdom, let it be****  
****And in my hour of darkness she is standing right in front of me****  
****Speaking words of wisdom, let it be**

"_Petrificus Totalus!" _he cried, and a Death Eater who was ready to hex a little boy was petrified. Then, he stumbled on a dead body, he didn't dare look at it, his heartbeat just increased, and he slid his hand in his pocket to grab his son's photograph.

He couldn't feel more relieved that Nymphadora had heard him and had stayed at home. All he had to do now was to fight and then to manage to get alive out of it. _Piece of cake_, he thought bitterly, as he stunned two Death Eaters. The situation was extremely difficult. They were surrounded. Outnumbered was such a poorly descriptive word for their analogy. Remus found himself throwing curses everywhere, not even knowing where they ended up. For the first time since he got at Hogwarts, he could find himself desperately begging for help.

******Let it be, let it be, let it be, let it be****  
****Whisper words of wisdom, let it be**

And then, just when he thanked his luck once again for the fact that Nymphadora was not there, he turned his face around, and faced her. She was running towards him, her dark blond hair messy, her face sweaty, her breathing irregular. She fell into his arms. "Why?" he shouted, holding her tightly. "Why did you come? You shouldn't have!"

"Shut up." She quickly said, protecting themselves from a curse which was heading right on them. "It's you that needs me tonight, more than Teddy. Here, drink this. A sip will do." She revealed a tiny bottle from the pocket of her robes.

"Are you joking?" he shouted, hexing a female Death-Eater. "What the hell is that?"

"It will make your reflexes better. Mum gave it to me. I've already had some, we'll be able to fight more people at once with it."

He trusted his wife, and the idea didn't sound bad. The more Death Eaters he could fight, the better. He quickly took a sip from the potion in the bottle. It tasted really funny, it made him dizzy for a moment, but then he managed to stay upright and continue fighting.

**And when the broken hearted people living in the world agree****  
****There will be an answer, let it be****  
****For though they may be parted, there is still a chance that they will see****  
****There will be an answer, let it be****  
****Let it be, let it be, let it be, let it be**

He felt her moving by his side, sending lightnings with her wand in all different directions. "Let's hope your mum's potion will work." He shouted, "for we're not in an easy situation here." People around them were falling injured, dead, more Death Eaters were coming, Remus spotted a red head falling on the floor, suddenly he knew it was Fred, he felt his heart catching on his throat. What would they do?

He knew that crazy laughter, he would always recognize the laughter of the woman who had killed Sirius. Bellatrix Lestrange was there, and he knew he was there because of his wife. Bellatrix wanted Nymphadora and she had finally found her. His heart was beating so fast in his ears that it was almost impossible to think or to react. Nymphadora was in grave danger. And there was Dolohov, pointing at him with his wand. "_Stupefy!" _cried Remus, but Dolohov managed to get away, and to shout "_Expelliarmus!" _He felt his wand flying from his hand, and could only think that Andromeda's potion had probably gone old. His reflexes had betrayed him. There he stood, weaponless, with a Death Eater pointing at him with his wand, with his wife fighting by his side, with Bellatrix's insane voice shrieking "Say goodbye to your husband, itsy bitsy Tonksie!"

Dolohov opened his mouth and raised his wand.

**There will be an answer, let it be****  
****Let it be, let it be, let it be, let it be****  
****Whisper words of wisdom, let it be****  
****Let it be, let it be, let it be, let it be****  
****Whisper words of wisdom, let it be****  
**

Remus Lupin turned to look at his wife. He saw her robes moving quickly with her body, as she tried to get saved, he saw the chord on her pale neck on which he always loved pressing his lips, he saw a swish of dark blond hair as she rapidly turned to look at him. His eyes met her terrified ones.

They were lavender. And they certainly were the most beautiful eyes he had ever seen.

**And when the night is cloudy there is still a light that shines on me****  
****Shine until tomorrow, let it be****  
****I wake up to the sound of music, Mother Mary comes to me****  
****Speaking words of wisdom, let it be**

Her eyes were looking at him embarrassed; she had just tripped over the troll foot umbrella stand. Her eyes were looking at him pleadingly, begging him to accept her love, as she was clutching the collar of his robes. Her eyes were looking at him teasingly; she was wearing the most colorful wedding dress he had ever seen. Her eyes were looking at him with need, asking for mercy, as he touched every inch of her naked, pulsating body. Her eyes were looking at their baby, full of love, and their baby was looking at them with the same eyes that he had, it was the only thing it had gotten from him, every other feature belonged to her. It was a pity, really, that their Teddy didn't have her eyes. Because her eyes were beautiful.

His hand found hers. Not every man was so lucky to die while staring at these eyes.

"I love y…"

"_Avada Kedavra!"_

Remus Lupin felt her falling next to him, as his own body followed her on the ground.

******Let it be, let it be, let it be, yeah, let it be****  
****There will be an answer, let it be****  
****Let it be, let it be, let it be, yeah, let it be****  
****Whisper words of wisdom, let it be**

**Please, tell me your opinion!**


	25. Lament, Prayer, Ressurection

**Here, I promised there would be more:) Though the next chapter might take a while, as I'm writing exams this week. **

Aunt Prudence rocked the crying baby, as Andromeda Tonks left the house, not really knowing what she was doing, not really able to control her actions. She didn't even realize how she made her way from London to Hogwarts, she knew she had apparated to Hogsmeade, but then, had she flown? It was all a blur. She stopped. She sensed from the air, from the people's faces and voices that it all had ended well, they were happy, excited, despite the fact that the school was destroyed, that there were corpses everywhere. They had won. But she knew that it had not ended up well for her. Nobody had told her, she just knew. She knew before she even entered the Great Hall, she knew before she found any sign, a mother always knew. She watched injured, dirty people smiling, nodding, whispering, looking at Harry Potter, she watched Harry Potter himself in a corner, she could watch, she just couldn't _see. _She couldn't see anything, until she found them.

Remus was laying on a stretcher, pale, motionless, with shut eyes and dried blood on his slightly smiling face. He looked cold, she knew he would be frozen if she touched him, though she couldn't. She couldn't bring herself to touch Remus Lupin, as on another stretcher next to him, with her hand in his, lay her precious daughter, her Nymphadora, dirty blond hair embracing her peaceful features, her head slightly tilted to her husband's, looking, like him, just asleep, if it weren't for the dried blood.

Her knees betrayed her, and she wished her heart would too, as she fell on the floor, leaving a knife-cutting scream, which made almost everyone in the Great Hall to turn and look at her. She was odd, she didn't belong in that place of celebration, of peaceful smiles and quiet voices, she was living her own drama, the woman in the emerald green robes who had buried her head in her child's chest, mourning, her body shaking violently.

She knew that a small crowd had gathered around the scene, she could sense Harry Potter there, she could two girls sobbing, she had taken glimpse of quite a lot Weasley ginger around her, but she didn't care. She just lay there, holding the motionless, cold hand that belonged to her daughter, the hand that used to be tiny and soft, the hand that used to fit into her own. She placed teary kisses on Nymphadora's cheeks, oh, how she had hated that name, and then she stroked her hair, which had the same color as her father's, Ted.

"Mrs. Tonks," that would be Molly Weasley's broken voice. "Mrs. Tonks, please get away."

No one dared touch her. _What do you know_? Her insides were screaming.

It was like Molly Weasley had read her mind. "I lost a son today, Mrs. Tonks." She said softly, but Andromeda didn't move. She cried quietly over her daughter's dead body, until she felt a gentle touch on her shoulder, and then an arm around her back. She got ready to shout at a Weasley family member, but then her heart almost stopped. She knew that scent, she would recognize it everywhere, and she would never forget it. Narcissa had never changed her expensive perfume, even though she didn't need it, Narcissa always had a nice scent. That was Narcissa though, wearing perfume even to go to fight. Andromeda didn't say anything, what could she say anyway? She refused to leave the body, even when her sister tried to pull her violently from it. "You can't do anything, Dromeda, come now. Come."

Indeed she couldn't do anything. But then, why did her daughter's hand suddenly feel warmer in her own, why could she feel a slight pulse on her neck?

She was going crazy, but it was alright. It didn't really matter. She smiled under her tears, and her grip on Nymphadora tightened. "I won't leave you." She whispered, knowing that her girl wouldn't hear, that her girl wouldn't answer.

Her girl, however, opened her eyes, and said in a croaked, crummy voice: "Blimey, thanks mum, I appreciate it, but couldn't you hold your tears? I'm bloody soaked!"

**I'm so so nervous about this plot twist! I hope you like it till now, and want to read more. Just be a little patient!**

**Thank you so much for your reviews!**


	26. Now Rest

**Well, I honestly don't know how to thank you for all your enthusiastic reviews! I appreciate the support so much, and I'm extremely happy that you like the turn of events! I completely understand that it might seem foolish, or terrible to many of you, as yes, now it has started getting AU, but well, that's fanfiction and I apologize, I'll really try to make it better :) I love constructive criticism, and I want to hear every single opinion! **

**Well, this is probably getting too much, but just give a chance to this story :)**

**Thank you a million times!**

Harry Potter could not remember to ever notice such silence, which was almost shouting, in his life. Everybody who was around and had witnessed the scene in the Great Hall was frozen, the Weasley family, Hermione, Kingsley, Augusta Longbottom, her grandson and Luna, Narcissa Malfoy, Horace Slughorn and Pomona Sprout were looking at them with wide open eyes, with mask-like faces. As for Andromeda Tonks, she was still clutching on her daughter, pale and starstruck like she had seen a ghost, which wasn't too far from reality, actually.

Nymphadora Tonks stirred, she certainly was in a terrible state, but no one could believe that she was awake and breathing. They had checked multiple times, she had been ice cold with no pulse, and she had certainly been hit with a killing curse, the same with her husband. And now, nobody could call Andromeda crazy, as they were all witnessing the same scene. Were they out of their minds? They had all experienced and seen extraordinary magic that day, of the most evil and sinister kind, but also from the most beautiful and unique. They had learnt to hope, they had learnt to believe, but that was too much. They all stood there, watching in awe, as the woman who was listed as dead brought a hand on her bloody forehead and struggled to breathe. Each and every one of them felt the urge to pinch themselves, they were most certainly hallucinating, as a post-traumatic stress side-effect. Narcissa was still holding her sister, and suddenly felt ashamed, she knew that she, of all people, didn't belong there, in the middle of all the kind and good ones, of all the hurt and poor, not after what she had done. She slowly stepped back, as Andromeda cupped Nymphadora's face with her hands. She was more than willing to believe what she was seeing. "Are you alive?" she whispered.

"Absolutely, couldn't be more." She croaked.

"How are you feeling?"

"Bloody brilliant, if you overlook the fact that I can't really breathe."

Everybody around started applauding and laughing, after Ginny did a hesitant beginning, that certainly was a miracle, a miracle which no one had seen before. Everybody, apart from some people who had lost their loved ones, and were trying to make them stir the same way. Tragically enough, they did not succeed. Well, most of them did not. Because they were ready to witness another miracle before their very eyes. After Molly Weasley laughed and sobbed and screamed because of her massive joy to see Nymphadora waking up, she had run to her dead son's body, being followed by an alarmed George, and they had found his eyes opened, though it was impossible for him to move. "At last, Holey, just in time for someone to get me to that damn infirmary." He had said to his brother in the same hoarse voice. The Weasley family and Hermione were screaming and hugging frantically, like in a delirium, they could not bring themselves to believe that Fred was alive too. Unfortunately, him and Nymphadora were the only "resurrected" ones which could be seen in the Great Hall. Other people, whose hopes had died were already mourning their loved ones for the second time, while Fred was being carried to Madame Pomfrey. Harry Potter was the one who had almost got Down and then found himself to be alive that day, so he realized he could easily believe the fact that Fred and Tonks had woken up. He quickly rushed and kneeled next to the woman, holding the hand which wasn't being held by Andromeda. "That's the most amazing thing that happened today!" he smiled. "But… how?"

"I knew you were the one who'd ask first. I will explain. But not now." The woman pleaded. She certainly was too weak and exhausted to do that, and Andromeda with Harry levitated her stretcher and followed the Weasley's to the infirmary. "Where is he?" she asked breathlessly while they were in their way. "Where is Remus? Did he wake up too?"

"Shh…" Andromeda squeezed her hand, as fresh tears appeared. Now that her daughter was alive, she could freely mourn her son-in-law.

"He must have woken up!" cried Nymphadora, as they entered the infirmary, and ended up having a coughing fit.

"Please, Nymphadora you mustn't shout! You must heal." Madame Pomfrey saw them and hurried to help them place her on a bed.

"No, go and get Remus! He's alive!"

"He isn't love," Andromeda said between her sobs. "Remus didn't make it. He didn't wake up."

"HE WILL!" Nymphadora was looking like she was having a fit. "Go and get him!"

Madame Pomfrey was shocked. "Calm down! You are in a terrible state!"

"HeMUST be alive! Don't get the body away, don't bury him, just keep him, bring him here!" she screamed. "I know what's happened to him!"

Her mother shook her head. "You'll tell us later, darling. Now rest…"

Nymphadora clutched Harry's hand and shaked it. "That's all I'm asking you to do. DON'T bury him yet! Do you hear me, Harry? _You _must trust me!"

Harry Potter ignored Andromeda's grimaces and nodded. "I do. Don't worry, Tonks, I promise we'll keep his body. Believe me, I want him back as much as you do."

And then, Poppy Pomfrey forced a potion into her mouth, and she immediately felt her eyelids heavy. "There's also a girl, Harry." Her voice sounded faint. "A first-year girl. Don't bury any first year girl." She managed to say, before she was forced to a heavy sleep.


	27. The Draught of Living Death

Everything was dark, and it hurt opening her eyes. Producing voice wasn't really easy either. But she had to. A name was struggling to get out of her mouth. "R… Remus."

"She's waking up!" she heard a girl saying. Was it Ginny or Hermione? It could even be Luna, she couldn't really tell. "She's waking up!"

She managed to open her eyes. It was Ginny. She was standing over her bed. She then saw her mum, Harry, Hermione, Ron, Bill and Minerva McGonagall.

"Am I alive?"

"Surprisinigly enough, you are." Was McGonagall's joyful voice. "Poppy had quite a challenge taking care of you though, the curses were really severe, but you'll fully heal."

"Where is Teddy?" she finally managed to ask with an anxious voice.

"She's with Aunt Prudence." Smiled Andromeda. She couldn't be more thankful for having her daughter back. "Don't worry about him, you'll get to see him soon."

She turned to look at Ginny. "Is Fred alright?"

The girl snorted. "More than I've seen him in months! He's with mum, dad and George. I was there but their brought-back-from-the-dead jokes were so disturbing that I came to see you. He hasn't stop saying how he owes it all to you!"

"Where is Remus?"

They all looked at each other awkwardly. It was Harry who spoke. "He's here, in the infirmary, as you wished, but he's not… alive."

Tears started rolling from her face. She suddenly looked ten years older. "But I woke up! Why didn't he!" her chest was aching, and she couldn't stand it anymore. The pain was unbearable. She thought of drifting back to sleep, when Molly and Arthur Weasley rushed to her bedside. Molly was glowing. She sat next to her and held her hand, then kissed it. "We don't know how to thank you!" she said between her tears.

"It was nothing, really, Molly." She muttered.

"How did you wake up? How did you save him?"

Tonks sighed. She guessed that she couldn't get away from it anymore. Besides, if she told them the story, it was possible that they could bring him back. "Alright." She said. "Here it goes."

_Teddy drifted to sleep, and Nymphadora placed him to his crib, feeling completely numb. It was impossible to stay away from fighting when her husband was out there, risking his life. The thought made her knees bend and her heartbeat fasten. She couldn't lose him, she _couldn't_. Teddy couldn't. She had to go. When she became an Auror, when she became a member of the Order, she knew what she was signing up for, she knew that it was possible that she would die fighting. She'd never minded sacrificing her life for her beliefs._

_But that was before she became a mother. _

_That had changed everything. Teddy needed her. Teddy was helpless, Teddy was tiny, Teddy needed his mother and father._

_Nymphadora Lupin's heart was ready to explode out of her chest. She _would_ go at Hogwarts, she _would_ go to fight._

_But before that, she had to make a quick stop at Grimmauld Place no. 12._

_They would both fight violently, they just couldn't afford to die. She wasn't afraid of death, no, she never had a problem to sacrifice herself to save others. But now something had changed inside her. She knew that she _had _to live, not because she wanted to, but because she had a child, as Remus had very kindly reminded her. No, she hadn't forgotten. She had never forgotten that she was a mother. _

_There was only one way. What happened to her was exactly what happens in everybody's life very few times, when they are in terrible danger and need, and their brains start working twice as fast as usually. Sometimes, thinking under pressure is undoubtedly more effective. Her head was immediately filled with a hundred different images at the same time: The essay she had to write while she was studying to become an Auror was about the Draught of Living Death. She could remember writing it, she could remember doing the research in heavy dusty books, she couldn't really concentrate, it was spring and the sun was shining, and all she wanted was to go out with her friends from Hogwarts, get drunk and party. So much had changed since then. She would never forget that evening when she had to stay inside and search for four hours about the results of mixing the Draught with the antidote._

"_The draught's mixture with the same amount of its antidote, will lead to significant alterations in the results of the potion. It will still send the receiver into a deep, death-like sleep, with the same symptoms, (cold skin, remarkably decreased heart rate, disappearance of environmental stimulus), however it will be for a limited period of time, usually from eight to forty eight hours. Nothing can be done for the receiver to regain consciousness if he/she does not normally during the expected period. In addition, when the Draught is mixed with the antidote, the receiver does not drift to sleep after drinking it, but only when his/her life is threatened, if this happens during the following hour. In case of accident or murder attempt, the receiver will look dead as expected, but will not be. In the past, the mixture has been noted to work even for victims of the killing curse, though not many of them actually were brought back to consciousness in the end. It's an extremely rare case, and the side-effects the mixture might leave to the survivor are unknown. The Squib's William Shakespeare's (extremely popular theatrical author for the Muggles) tale, _Romeo and Juliet, _is believed to talk about the usage of the Draught of Living Death mixed with its antidote…"_

_And then more images, images of happier times which she terribly missed, she was helping Molly and the kids to clean the Headquarters, she had knocked a dusty cupboard with many little bottles of dark, forbidden potions and Sirius had rushed into the room. _

"_Bloody hell, Nymph, can't you be a little more careful? I don't even want to think what one of these evil little bottles will do to you if they break on your head! You'll probably grow hairy horns, or something like that!"_

_She had examined the bottles, as that was a part of her job, and she had immediately recognized the clear as water potion, in the tiniest and foggiest of bottles. She had whistled. "This potion is bloody insane! It took me months to finally make some of it, my cauldron kept exploding! Not to mention that stupid final essay!"_

_There wasn't much time left. Remus could be fighting at the moment. He could need her help. He could be injured. He could even be… _

_She shook her head as her heart pounded violently in her ears. She didn't even dare think it was too late. She just disapparated at the Headquarters and said "I didn't kill you, Albus", to Mad-Eye's protection charm. She rushed into the kitchen. Everything was in order, like the last time she had been there, only dustier and darker. "Lumos", she whispered, and a faint light appeared on the tip of her wand. Suddenly, the kitchen brought everything back to her mind. She was helping Molly prepare dinner and she was knocking chairs over, and the children were running around, the twins were asking her to try their Wheezes, she pictured Sirius in that kitchen, with his black boots resting rudely on the table, teasing her about Remus, oh, Remus, she would never forget all those times she had awkwardly bumped into him, those sleepless nights when she visited the Headquarters, she always ended up burning the cocoa and he would make her another cup, and she would try to flirt, and then she would blush violently and forget everything she had wanted to say because he would look at her with his amused, gentle chocolate brown eyes, and the last time they had been in that kitchen, after Sirius death, she had ended up with a serious cut in her hand and Remus had immediately offered to cure it, and she had ended up crying over the sink because he had rejected her, he was _too old, too poor, too dangerous. _Suddenly, all Nymphadora Tonks wanted to do at the moment was to curl on the floor, press her forehead over the cold tiles and cry again like a baby, waiting for everything to magically end. _

_But that was impossible. Nothing would end if she curled on the floor. Magic itself couldn't cure anything without one's conscious actions and decisions. Nymphadora Tonks opened the same cupboard, with her heart on her throat, and found the little dirty bottle. _Please, let it be here too, let it be here. _It was there. Another bottle, which she recognized as the antidote was there, and she quickly waved her wand to mix equal amounts of the both of them. Her hand was shaking, causing a few precious drops to fall on the kitchen table. She shook the full bottle. It looked fine, it had the expected light purple color, it should work, it _had _to work._

_She took a sip of the newly made potion. Her knees bended and her head turned, she grabbed a chair and shut her eyes tightly. When she opened them, she felt strong enough to walk out of the house and disapparate to Hogsmeade._

**Please review. It's crucial, especially at this part of the story. I'd love to know what you think.**

**Thank you soooo much!**


	28. Everything went dark

**I'm sorry for taking so long to update my story, it's just that I uploaded a new one-shot called Christmas Mischief Managed. I'd be so happy if you took a look at it too:)**

**Thank you so much for your enormous support!**

**I hope you'll like this chapter!**

_From the moment she set her foot on the Hogwarts grounds, she sensed was going on. It was impossible not to step on the corpses, it was impossible not to hear the screams, it was impossible not to pass near lightnings of hexes and curses, it was impossible not to smell death everywhere. That was where she belonged. She belonged here to save people, to fight for them, for her husband, her son, her mother, Mad-Eye and Sirius, her dad and Dumbledore, Harry, Mrs. Weasley, all her friends who loved her and believed to her, all her dear ones she had lost. Remus was nowhere to be seen. She ran into the castle, her wand on her hand, protecting herself from curses flying around. She spotted Hestia Jones and Bill Weasley, fighting with six Death-Eaters. She ran upstairs, she had to find someone who wasn't fighting, to tell her where Remus was. When she reached the seventh floor, she spotted, Ginny who had an insanely worried expression. She ran towards her. They looked at each other, without talking. There was also Augusta Longbottom. Suddenly, they saw Harry._

_"Ah, Potter," said the elder lady. "You can tell us what's going on."_

_Harry would know. "Is everyone OK?" Tonks and Ginny asked._

_"'S far as we know," he answered. "Are there still people in the passage to the Hog's Head?"_

_"I was the last to come through." Said Mrs. Longbottom. "I sealed it, I think it unwise to leave it open now Aberforth has left his pub. Have you seen my grandson?"_

_"He's fighting," said Harry._

_"Naturally. Excuse me, I must go and assist him." She left._

_Harry looked at Nymphadora, and her heart begun pounding like mad. He knew. She was certain that Harry knew._

_"I thought you were supposed to be with Teddy at your mother's?"_

_"I couldn't stand not knowing… She'll look after him… have you seen Remus?"_

_"He was planning to lead a group of fighters into the grounds…"_

_Her heart almost stopped for a moment, and she started running down the stairs._

_The grounds were full of people fighting, she could notice at once that they were outnumbered. Her head turned around frantically, trying to find her husband, but it was impossible. She clutched the bottle in her pocket, while she raised her wand and protected herself from several curses that flew in her way. She scanned the place, it was getting dark. The only acquaintance she could spot was Fred Weasley. He had just stunned a Death Eater and looked free, which gave her the chance to run towards him._

"_Tonks, hey, howya doin'?" he smiled. "How's Moony Junior?"_

_She forced a smile. "Perfect. Listen, Fred, take a sip of this, will you? It will help."_

_She placed the bottle in his open hand. He looked surprised, but then shrugged. "I'm more than willing to drink unknown potions, though Mad-Eye wouldn't approve. Quite challenging, it is!" he took a sip and handed her the bottle. He looked a little dizzy, but then turned around and casted a successful petrifying charm to a Death Eater. She sighed in relief, and left to go and look for her husband. However, she stumbled on someone, she knew that it was a corpse, but it wasn't. A little dark haired girl, certainly no older than eleven, had fallen on the floor. She was crying and she looked terrified. Nymphadora kneeled on the ground. "What are you doing here?" she shouted. "Quickly, run! Leave!"_

"_No!" cried the girl. "I'm not following the others! Mum's here, fighting! I want to see what happens! I won't leave her!" The girl stared at her with huge, brown, pleading eyes. "Go and save my mum!"_

"_It's dangerous, don't you see?" Nymphadora shouted, but then she understood. _She _would never leave a scene where her mother was fighting, or Remus, or her dad. "Here, drink this. It will keep you safe."_

_The girl looked at the bottle hesitantly, and finally took a sip. Just when Nymphadora closed the bottle, a green light hit the little girl straight on the chest, and she fell on the floor, dead. _

_Tears were filling Nymphadora's eyes, and now she knew that she couldn't lose any more time. She quickly got up and saw him, stunning two Death Eaters. A huge smile appeared on her tormented face. He was alive. She run and fell__ into his arms. "Why?" he shouted, holding her tightly. "Why did you come? You shouldn't have!" _

"_Shut up." She quickly said, protecting themselves from a curse which was heading right on them. "It's you that needs me tonight, more than Teddy. Here, drink this. A sip will do." She revealed the bottle from the pocket of her robes. _

"_Are you joking?" he shouted, hexing a female Death-Eater. "What the hell is that?"_

_She had to admit that she was expecting such a reaction, not from the others that she had tried to save, but from Remus. She couldn't say that the potion would save him, he probably thought that he deserved to die like James and Sirius, and if he had to die fighting he would most certainly accept it. Her mind worked quickly. "It will make… your reflexes better. Mum gave it to me. I've already had some, we'll be able to fight more people at once with it." _

_She was glad that he was a trusting man. She sighed in relief as she watched her drinking the last two drops which were in the bottle. He looked a little ill, but immediately managed to continue fighting._

_She had already started sending hexes and protecting charms in all different directions. "Let's hope your mum's potion will work." He shouted, "for we're not in an easy situation here." People around them were falling injured, dead, more Death Eaters were coming._

_And then she heard her. She had expected that she would find her, sooner or later. She was laughing crazily, like that time when she had finished her cousin off, the murderer was here, Bellatrix had come for her. And there was Dolohov, pointing at him with his wand. "Stupefy!" cried Remus, but Dolohov managed to get away, and to shout "Expelliarmus!" Remus wand flew from his hand. Nymphadora tried to stun both of them but in vain, she couldn't fight four Death Eaters at once by her own, she had already been fighting with two others. "Say goodbye to your husband, itsy bitchy Tonksie!" cried Bellatrix._

_It would be alright, it would really be fine. She was an auror, after all. She wasn't afraid of her crazy aunt. She would soon be at home with Remus, holding their precious Teddy again, Andromeda didn't have to worry. She could handle it._

_She didn't know why, but she wanted to take a look at Remus' face. She knew that it was such a thoughtless thing to do, but she knew his chocolate brown eyes would give her strength like they had in every other battle they had fought together. He would smile reassuringly, and she would nod, and then they would defeat every single Death-Eater around them._

_He turned and looked at her for a second. Their eyes met. They wouldn't get them. They had been through this before. They had taken the potion, too, but they would probably not need it, no charm had ever got them._

_Remus opened his mouth. "I love y…"_

"_Avada Kedavra!"_

_Everything went dark._


	29. You can call it the end if you want

**Have a very Merry Christmas, I wish you health, happiness, love and peace! Have a great time with your loved ones!**

**This happy ending is my Christmas gift for you:)**

When Nymphadora finished her story, she noticed that everybody was starstruck. Andromeda was looking at her with pride. Molly Weasley had tears in her eyes, and her hand was covering her mouth in shock.

"Bloody brilliant, that was!" cried Ron. Hermione nodded.

"We really don't know how to thank you, Tonks!" grinned Arthur, and Molly pulled her into a warm hug. "Our Fred owes his life to you."

Just then, the infirmary door opened widely, and a dirty man with dried blood on his face, who probably hadn't had a bath since the war was over, burst in, holding a little girl in his arms.

It was that girl.

"My daughter woke up!" he cried, running to Madame Pomfrey. "I thought she was dead, like my wife, but then I heard her call my name!"

They immediately understood. The girl was already pointing at Tonks with a weak hand. "It was her, dad. She gave me a potion, she saved me!"

Madame Pomfrey took care of her as the father ran to Tonks' bedside. "It was really you…" he muttered. "I don't know how to thank you! I really don't know how!"

She was tired, her head was turning. "It was nothing, really. I wish I could have saved your wife too. I didn't know…"

He didn't answer, he probably was in much pain, he just shook his head.

"Listen," she said, "I won't say I'm sorry for your loss, because I know exactly how you're feeling, I know that saying I'm sorry won't bring her back. I just wish the best for your girl."

He nodded, and she noticed that he was struggling not to cry. "Thank you." He whispered. "Thank you so much!"

He left to go to his daughter. Tonks couldn't stand it anymore. It hurt so much. The others left her alone to rest, and to see Fred. "What about him?" she asked in a quiet voice when Madame Pomfrey was back to check on her. "What about Remus?"

The nurse looked at her sadly. "The only explanation I have is that the potion might have problems when it's mixed with Wolfsbane. I won't lie to you, Nymphadora. I don't know if he'll make it."

_Nothing can be done for the receiver to regain consciousness if he/she does not normally during the expected period... not many of them actually were brought back to consciousness in the end... _

Her head was turning. Her mother tried to say something.

"Not now." She stopped her in a tiny voice. "I can't… I need to be alone."

RLNTRLNTRLNTRLNT

She opened her eyes. Andromeda was nowhere to be seen, she had probably gone back home to be with Teddy, at least Nymphadora hoped she had, she hated thinking of her little baby being so far from her, and poor Aunt Prudence would have been so worried! Her muscles were aching, it felt exactly like the last time she had been in St. Mungo's after the battle at the Department of Mysteries, just that now everything hurt a million times more, because he wasn't there to wait for her to wake up. She reached for her wand on the table next to her bed, and casted a light. She managed to move her aching body and get out of bed. She looked around with the light of her wand. There he was, laying motionless and pale, three beds away from her. It was difficult to get there, but she managed to make it and sit on his bedside. He was slightly smiling, and his eyes were closed. He stroked his cold cheek with a trembling hand, as new tears started rolling on her cheeks. She was extremely thankful that they had kept him there. She had never been more scared and alone in her whole life. He _had _to wake up.

"What do you think you're doing there?" he heard Madame Pomfrey hissing in the dark behind here. "You're not strong enough!"

She turned her face to her. "I'm begging you, do something!" she pleaded.

"There's nothing I can do, Nymphadora." The nurse said uncomfortably. "Forty four hours have already passed, so…"

Tonks just pulled her knees to her chest and sat on the chair next to his bed.

She waited… and waited… They couldn't say he was dead. His body didn't exactly seem like a dead one. The best description was that he was in a coma. And they didn't know whether he would ever wake up.

Poppy Pomfrey had never witnessed so much pain. It was the first time that she didn't dare apply pressure on her patient, she couldn't force her to go back to bed. Tonks almost fell asleep on the chair and immediately was violently woken up from the early summer heat, combined with her fever. She forced her muscles to move in the middle of the night, as she had to reach for her wand in order to open the window. She stood up, and everything became blurry. Her knees betrayed her and she fell on the floor.

And then, as in a wonderful dream, she heard his faint voice.

"God damn it, Dora, watch that clumsiness!"


End file.
